Naruto The Chaos Knight
by Craine
Summary: The God of Chaos has found a new plaything! As a result he has been endowed with the powers of discord. How will this affect the life of Naruto Uzumaki when he is chosen as the catalyst of Chaos. NaruxHarem... Expect... RANDOMNESS of all shapes and size
1. The Day His Life Changed

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_YO!!!! Craine has returned... yet again!!!!!! As some of my fans may know, I have a tendancy to relate many facts of life... to Chaos. So I'm thinking... Why the in the fuck not?! I'm going to make a Naruto fic with all of the chaotic properties that reside within my highly unstable mind. So prepare yourselves... FOR CHAOS!!!!!!!!!!_**

**_May discord erupt!!!_**

**_Disclaimer: I don't Naruto... or Chaos... or Religon. Trust me, I am not attempting to make fun of Religion in any form or way. If you don't understand what I'm saying... well... just read_**

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Chapter One: The Day His Life Changed

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/\/\/\/\/\/\ 

Deep in the Land of Fire; within the once beautiful village of Konoha, distaster had struck in the worst possible way. The village was in ruins... Building were collapsed and broken, the roads were faultered and crumbled, the skys were dark and reddened with blood. Hundreds of Leaf and enemy Ninja had lost their lives; their bodies scattered throughout the villige's confines with kunai and other weapons skewered within them. Konoha had been attacked by an army of renagade Shinobi that were Hell-bent on taking it all by storm...

and they would have succeeded... had it not been for one Godly Ninja...

Within the very center of the desacrated village, stood a very proud and shirtless battle torn, blue eyed boy with wild dirty blonde hair. His form was the embodiment of dominance and prestege, his power knew no limits or weakness, his jutsu; vast and omnipotent, his chakra, flaming and overpowering. He knew only hardships and the thirst for battle; the traits that ultimatly led to the salvation of a dying village.

This deity among beings boldly stood upon a huge pile of dead ninja that he had single handedly destroyed with his bare hands. Despite his unfathomable fatigue, he stood strong with his chest out and his fists resting upon his hips; staring into the clouded sky with an undying hope for the future. He had seen true evil... he had seen everything. He would not allow his home to be taken by enemy hands; so long as his body drew breath, he would step forward and set the opposing forces ablaze with the Will of Fire that his soul burned with

"Yeah... Fuck with me, now...", he growled with smooth and yet beastly voice.

As if on cue, the familiar form of the Sandaime Hokage, Saurtobi came running from behind; flailing his arms about while trying to get to Konoha's Savior. Once he arrived, the blonde God of a man turned his head back only to see Saurtobi plunged to his knees while constantly bowing as though he were worshipping such a being.

"Oh, Great Naruto! Oh Great Naruto! You have indeed proven your worth and loyalty to this village with every bit of Godly wonder that you are! I am not worthy...", the Third Hokage bowed.

Naruto Uzumaki smiled graciously, before he heard a series of cheers. He returned his vison back to the front only to see ALL of the villagers screaming and cheering the cries of joy that signafied Konoha's grand freedom from Tyranny and Fear... and the thourogh embrace of their ultimate warrior. Tears of nostalgic enjoyment and total bliss filled Naruto's eyes as he watched all that he had ever dreamed of come to full form right in front of him. Even some of Konoha's most beautiful women swooned over him now. The clouds began to part; shimmering the light of hope upon the village and reveiling parts of the blue sky once again.

But what was about to happen next... not even he could predict.

Suddenly, Naruto felt something press against the top pf his head. He looked back only to see Saurtobi smiling at him with his hat off.

It couldn't be...

"Naruto Uzumaki... For your bravery against the darkest of times, your determination and faith among the lives of Konohagakure no Sato and your overall strength that carrys on the eternal Will of Fire that blazes within all of us, I, the former Sandaime Hokage... herby benounce you... as Godaime Hokage", Saurtobi proudly declared, triggering a grand roar of aproval from the crowd.

"NARUTO! NARUTO! NARUTO!"

/\/\/\/\/\/\

Back in the plain of reality

"Naruto... Naruto...! NARUTO... **NARUTOOOOO!!!!!!!"**, the super irritated voice of Iruka bellowed in his feutile attempts to wake the young twelve year old from his dreamy slumber.

The only response he got was a peacful snore. Growing more and more irritaed with this bafoonary, Iruka reached under his desk and pulled out a large text book. Tossing it up with ease, the teacher caught it with the same hand before instantaneously reeling back and throwing the book like a whirling shuriken of death; making direct contact with the center of Naruto's head. The blonde academy student was abruptly awoken by the agonizingly sharp pain that shot through his head before lifting from off of the table with his arms flailing in the air; spurting pints of his saliva all over the place.

Unfortunately, a pink haired, jade eyed girl named Sakura Haruno was sitting RIGHT next to him and incurred the wrath of the sloppy spit fest. She didn't move though... in fact she stood perfectly still with a blank and perfectly unreadible look on her face. Naruto screamed in agony while holding his head with both arms; whirling about in his seat screaming, 'DAMN, DAMN, DAMN!!!!!'.

Seeming to have blown off a little steam from what he did, Iruka closed his eyes, "There... Maybe that'll teach you not to sleep in my class", he said.

Everyone in the classroom shared a hardy laugh at the pained blonde who simply feel back into his seat and crossed his arms in a huff.

"Well, ya didn't have to throw a book at my head...", he murmered.

Iruka's eyebrow twitched, "After calling your name for two minutes? No, the method seemed very plausible to me. Now wake up and pay attention, Naruto", he commanded.

The blue eyed boy scoffed, causing Iruka's face to scrunch up with a comically forced smile, Thats it!", he yelled; rising to his feet.

"Since Naruto likes to sleep in class and dream about clowns named Mike and Dave, or something like that, we'll all be taking a reveiw test of the Henge assignment. All who already passed are NOT exluded!", Iruka ordered, gaining collective, complaints from all of the other students before they all glared daggers at Naruto... except for Sakura... she just kinda sat there with the same blank expression on her face.

-(**A/N- I think we all know what happens during and after that day)-**

------

The next day, Naruto had taken his final exam... and failed... again. That would count to be his third failure at the academy and it was safe to say that he was feelin' pretty low. At the academy playgrounds, the kids who actually passed were praised and worshiped by their loving parents... elements of which Naruto was unfamiliar with, but long for deep down inside. The orange clad student sat one of the swings watching all of the families with a heavy heart. In truth, he had always told himself that he should be used to seeing this already, seen as how his constant failures held him back.

The only question that he had at that and for all of the other times that he failed, for that matter, was why the Hell it was so damn hard. He tried, he really did. He spilled his blood, sweat and tears while attempting to exceed his expectations, but no matter how hard he tried or how much he improved he always seemed to be one step behind... It was sad... and not just a little infuriating. The fact that two female villagers were sharing the same heartless glares that he has received from so many of the other villagers for reasons that he was simply unaware of.

Despite their beauty, it would be anyone's guess that two were some real bitches.

"Ugh! Look, there's that kid again...", a beautiful red head whispered to an equally as beatiful brunette as they shared looks of utter detest.

"Yeah I see him... I heard that he's the only one who failed", the brunette said a if she wasn't surprised in the slightest.

The red head scoffed, "Hmph! Serves him right... If he ever became a ninja he'd only cause trouble. That monster doesn't deserve such a prevlige, seen as how he-"

"-Shh! Were not supposed to talk about that, remember"

Even they were unaware (not that they gave a damn), Naruto had heard every single word and to say the least, it angered him. Used to be... Naruto who be greatly saddened at the hateful words that were adressed to him. It broke him inside knowing that so many people despised for... for... Well he didn't know what the Hell they despised him for, but he didn't like it. So he trained himself... he tried and tortured himself to gain the skill and stamina necassary to become a ninja and gain the respect of the villagers and his peers.

But it seemed that Fate had other plans, because no matter what he did, Naruto was a failiure... and a deep boiling rage was beginning to boil within him. As the two bitches walked away, Naruto could feel himself getting angrier and angrier. He slowly put on his goggles and shot to his feet. He didn't even notice the smooth voice of Mizuki calling next to him... he just ran off. There had to be a reason why things were the way they were and dammit, one way or another, he was gonna get it!

------

Two Hours Later...

A storm was brewing. And I'm not talking about those storms that would last a while in nature's good and harmless fun... I'm talking about a Storm... a real storm. At first, the once calm winds simply picked up in strength. However, as time passed on, the clouds grew dark... ney... they grew black... completely and totally black. All in Konoha retreated to their homes to sheild themselves from the storm... all except one.

Upon the Hokage Monument... stood the lost soul of Naruto Uzumaki. He stared down at the heartless village... agonizing about the facts he could not hope to understand. They all hated him... they all shunned him... despised him. Even his peers refused to except him for who he was as a person, just a nuisance. An annoyance and a freak. They picked on him. They laughed at him. They through things at him and and tormented him about being something he wasn't... a monster.

He just couldn't understand! Why was he hated?! Why was he cursed to this fate suffering and hardship.

"It shouldn't be this HAAAAAARRRRD!!!!!!!!!", he shrilled with fury; gaining an almost responsive lighteing bolt from the black skies.

Naruto squaded over; curling his arms and fists with the rage that now consumed, "Why... WHY?!?! Why am I tortured?! ANSWER ME!!!", he called out to the heavens for some sort of guidence, "Why was I dealt this fate?! What have I done to deserve this?! PLEASE... ANSWER ME?!"

The only response that the blonde got... was the oncoming droplettes of the unforgiving rain. For some reason, this only sky-rocketed Naruto's rage as burning red beams of power shot vertically upward from around his body.

"This... ISN'T... HAPPENIIIIIIING!!! RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!", he screamed again.

-

Somewhere close by...

Iruka had been searching for Naruto for a while. He checked the roads, he checked Ichiraku and pretty much every other place that he visited and hadn't seen him anywhere. Before Naruto left the playground where the other students were being praised for their accomplishments, Sarutobi had mentioned that he wanted to talk to him about something important. And it was very important... that day, Iruka had learned some very important things about Naruto... He learned that in a sense... they were the same.

The tanned Chuunin decided to take to the building to look for him and got the results he was looking for... when he heard a lament of fury quietly echoe from the direction of the Hokage Monument. Iruka stopped on a building to listen to the familiar voice, despite his worry for the boy... It was getting really bad outside.

-

Back upon the Monument...

Naruto's body was tensing greatly at the thoughts of what people and kids said to him... Like how much of a burden he was... How much of a beast he was... and how he deserved every bit of hardship and missfortune for he had done to Konoha. Even the kids made these bullshit remarks about things he wasn't responsible for. All of his people...

Everyone!

The veins within Naruto's fingers began to buldge out as he clinched his fist tremendously. The things that his peers told him... Even those who merely thought he was being ridiculous said that there was no excuse for the way he acted.

_"Just grow up you cry baby!_

_"You think you have it so hard?! You're probably just spoiled!"_

_"No one likes you loser! And since you can't except that, you have to make yourself look like an ass because everyone hates you!"_

_"You're just a big baby!"_

Naruto's pupils redened without his realization as he became fural and wild before howling to the skies; gaining a harder insertion of rain as a response "GRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!! They... They wouldn't be _talking_ to me that way if I could at LEAST become a ninja!!! RRRAAARRR!!!!", he hollered as several streams of rain cascaded down his entire being; from head to toe, "They would be NOTHING when I became the Hokage!!!!!!"

-

Appearantly, his cries didn't go unoticed by the villagers... or more precisely, the other students that shared his class (the other Rookie Nine). Though they never left their homes, villagers and many of the other children had peered out of their windows to see the source of this atroucity only to see how horrible the storm was. The entire village of Konoha was plunged into an eerie darkness. It was hard to beleive that it was narutl, but it was. It was indeed a moment as frightening as it was curious.

Who would be stupid enough to say out with whether like this?

-

Naruto red aura became more firey and vibrant as he began to curse the Heavens, "Dammit all to HEEEEEEEEELL!!!!! Why did you do this to me?! If there is a God, than why does he torment me?!?!?! I didn't do anything, yet I've been stuck in a world that won't except me!!!", he roared before hot streams of pain filled tears flooded down his already soaked face, "All I ever wanted was to be excepted... **WHY**?!?!?! This shouldn't be HAPPENING TO ME!!!! MRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!"

Once again, the bolts of ravaging lightening peirced the black cloud as an unforgiving response

/\/\/\/\/\/\

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

A vast and eternally beautiful paradise floored with golden tile that stretched past the abyss... A wonderous blue sky with clouds of never ending peace hugging the very heavens themselve... Several distant monuments and temples of Godly and otherwise Holy things...

All of this wonderment was what made up the Realm of the Gods. More specifically, was an enormous rim filled with a rippling sensational substance that seemed to reflect holy light of judgment. The rim rested upon a gaint plateau with four golden pillars evenly surrounding it. This massive contraption of omnipotence rested in front of a HUUUUUUUUGE(!!!) Holy Temple.

Standing over this... thing were two slender figures wearing Japanese Imperial clothing. Staring down at what they were seeing, the brother frowned deeply.

"Raijin..."

"Yes, Fujin..."

"I think he's cursing us again..."

"I can clearly see that"

"Well then... this calls-"

"-for drastic measures..."

The two Brothers, then whirled back to the direction of the humongous Temple; snapping their fingers.

"Hey, ZEUS!!!", they called out in unison.

In response, the gaint temple-doors slammed open reveiling the King of the Gods himself; shining brightly and eluminating the area with all of the Godly wonder that he pocessed. With his long silver hair flowing weightlessly in the non-excistent wind. The toga garbed deity marched proudly to the God's of Wind and Lightening with his dramatic Godly light radiating off of him as he approached. Once the picture of might stopped in front of them... his demeanor completely changed; slouching over, crossing his arms and vading his light away.

"This had better be important... I was in the middle of a heated Poker match with Ganesh and Jesus...", he grumbled lathargically.

Raijin and Fujin made a gap between them to allow Zeus to peek at what they called him there for.

"Oh its important, alright. Look", Fujin said; pointing down to the vison of a young blonde boy garbed an orange jumpsuit; screaming his head off at the skys and cursing the Gods for his misfortune.

"That little shits talking shit to us again. AGAIN!", Raijin exclaimed.

Zeus frowned, "Oh... (eye glimmers with murderous intent)... really", he said in a subdued manner.

Raijin and Fujin glanced at each other before slowly back-tracking to give Zeus the room to do his thing.

"Man... I never get tired this...", Fujin said with a smile.

At this, Zeus slowly rose his arms; emmiting powerful waves of lightening as he did so, "So, Mortal... You continue to damn the Gods, even at such a tender age... and for so long, at that. Hn. I am sure that you ill-suited fortune is the doing of the Sisters of Fate, but I can promise you this... cursing the Gods is the last mistake you will ever make; for I shall not tolerate this inselence any longer", he dominantly declared.

The clouds of the beautiful skys suddenly darkened as both of Zeus' hands formed brilliant sparkling lightening bolts of doom.

"Now... You wanted an answer... I've got your answer.. right here, you little-"

"HALT!!!", a deep and echoing voice shouted from within the giant temple, "I wouldn't do that..."

Raijin and Fuujin looked back and saw a LARGE being with a loosely fittnig black cloak over him, walk out of the temple.

"What're you doing here?", The Gods of Wind and Thunder said in unison.

The cloaked God squinted behind the hood over his head, "Your shift at the Pool of Visions... has expired... I'll take over for the next millenium or two...", he said gaining a nonchalant shrug from them.

Once Raijin and Fujin were gone in the flashes of Lightening and Wind, Zeus was left to deal with the one that the other Gods have deemed... the Black Sheep...

"And to what do I owe this interupption, Old freind", Zeus said, while never lowering his lightening bolts.

"Oh nothing at all... eeeexcept for the fact that Jesus just totally spiked your hand in that... Poker you like so much", the cloaked being said with a conceiled smile.

Zeus lowered his weapons of nature before dashing back into the buiding, "That son of a BITCH!!!", he hollered.

The Cloaked God smiled even more before closing the giant doors of the temple and turning around to the Pool of Visions to gander at the lamenting blonde in his sights, "Now then... Back to this... very important matter. Hmhmhmhmhm. So you wish to change your fate, little one? That is no easy feet. In fact it's damn near impossible, even for a God such as myself..."

The dark God's hands erected from his black robe as red, black, and yellow surges of electricity coursed through his limbs.

"However... when it comes to the anti-Laws of Chaos... anything... can be made... a reality... hmhmhmhmhm. Your rage is vast, my son, but it alone will not be enough to change thy fate. I will determine once and for all whether or not you have the gift... Naruto Uzumaki", he gruffly whispered.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

Back at the storming Konoha...

The rain had only intensified as did the ravaging bolts of chaos above. the soaked Naruto's rage and greif had further increased; equaling the ferosity of the storm since he had not gained any answers from teh so-called Gods. Depraived, Naruto inhaled all that his lungs could intake... and let out the loudest and longest roar of infuriated anguish that made the skys themselves cry out in greif; throwing his arms in the air and trembling wildly as his torso leaned back to deepen his seemingly endless howl.

Naruto's fists tightened so greatly that they didn't just draw blood... it gushed all over his arms... but the pain was non-excistent to the blonde.

"ANSWER MEEEEEEE-YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!"

-

Seeing the obvious agony he was in, Iruka was actually on the verge of tears as he saw the developement unfold. It was heart-breaking to see what kind of pain a child could endure, but even more so, when it was obviously taking it's tole...

"... Naruto..."

-

Naruto's howls could be heard throughout the cannies of the Village, "Wrooooaa-NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!", he roared again before a terrifying series of lightening bolt devoured the skys about the blonde boy.

Then... the unbarable happened...

-

Seeing the absolute horror, Iruka gasped. His soul was suddenly struck by a ferious blow of fear and doubt when he saw what he had saw. It was unthinkable. At that very moment, Iruka didn't care what happened in the past. He didn't care how much of a clown Naruto was in his class. It didn't matter what was sealed inside of him anymore. The boy had dreams... he had hopes... and a light for the future. But it happened so fast... it was natures unforgiving and cruel joke to play on a boy who had nothing.

Iruka wasted no more time... he dashed as fast as he possibly could to Naruto...

Even though, not many people get struck down by a lightening bolt and live to tell about it.

* * *

**_Hoo-HAH!!!! I can only hope that this has entertained you in some form or way. Despite the darkness of the first chapter, the story itself with be positively LOADED with humor and complete randomness. So be prepared!!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	2. A Full Recovery!

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_And we're back! Well, I can't say that this story will be a garanteed hit, but I'm definately going to try and get it up there. I didin't think I was going to get over 8 alerts for it! That was a pleasant surprise and hopefully I can take this shit up off the ground. And with that speech..._**

**_Let the CHAOS continue!_**

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Chapter Two: A Full Recovery?!

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Konoha Hospital...

Two hours had passed since the dreadful incident upon the Hokage Monument. Sitting in the waiting room oustide of the infirmary was the sweating and nail-biting Iruka, who was axciously awaiting the results of what kind of damage had befallen Naruto. The most he could tell, was that it sure as Hell didn't look good for him. The poor boy had been struck by a lightening bolt; that, alone, should have up and killed him right then and there. The poor boy fell off of the Monument; charred and crisped with electrifing results. Luckily for Naruto, Iruka flashed by just in time to catch him before he landed on his head. The thing that amazed the tanned Chuunin at the moment was that Naruto was still breathing...

Writhing in the greatest pain he'd ever felt in his life... but breathing.

In a nearly frantic and hysterical state, Iruka rushed Naruto to the hospital as fast as his legs could carry him. Once he arrived he was soaking wet from the trecherous storm outside; craddling the dying Naruto in his arms. Iruka begged for the assistance of the Med nin who were miraculously on the scene already. Though they knew EXACTLY what Iruka was carrying in his arms, the instinct that came with doing their job pushed them to rush the boy into intensive care and do all in their power to stablize him. Iruka wanted to go with them with every viber of his soul, but he knew he couldn't, yet that didn't stop him from worrying his head off when he finally calmed down enough to sit down and wait.

_"God... please let Naruto live through this... He's too young...", _Iruka sorrowfully prayed, whilst inwardly anticipating the worst, _"I... I never told him how... how sorry I was. Please... don't let him die..."_

The pony-tailed Chuunin's prayers were interuppted by the comforting hand of the Sandaime Hokage; looking a little down hearted himself.

"Iruka... I heard what had transpired this day... How bad is it?", Sarutobi asked.

Iruka stared sadly at the floor, "They... They haven't said anything yet... They still need to stablize him", he said simply.

The aged Professor showed only the slightest bit of grimace in his face before taking a seat next to Iruka, "I see... Well, the fact that Naruto had survived such a trial in the first place, must mean that he is not done fighting yet. It takes the heart of a true champion to live through Hell like that. You should be proud of him for staying alive...", he said in an attempt to comfort the scared man.

Iruka's gaze adored the floor for a moment longer before he actually managed to crack a genuine, "Yes... I am", he admitted.

-

Meanwhile in the Infirmary...

Two of the Hospitals best Med Nin had been working tirelessly to stablize Naruto. Well... one of them was... the other was peering into a blood sample taken from the boy through a microscope. Finally, after hours of torturous work, Naruto was finally stablized and breathing normally. The Med responsible for finishing the last of that job was positively overwelmed with exsasperation; wiping numerous beads of sweat from his brow as he breathed a sigh of releif.

"Damn... That was tedious", he said, before he heard a gasp from his Medic partner, "What? What is it?"

His partner had been stting at a desk; studying a sample Naruto's blood to see if everything was in place, only to see things that just didn't make any God damn sense.

"Come and take a look at this", the other Med said.

Doing as he was told, the Med who stablized Naruto loomed over the microscope to take a gander at what his partner was trippin on about.

"The Hell? Why have his blood cells changed? Three pronges? That doesn't make sense"

"Well, neither does the fact that we were actually able to safe this boy. After being fried by a lightening bolt... phew, someone up there must really like him if he survived something like that..."

As the Med continued his inspection with the blood cells, something that was just plain weird happened. As the blood cells morphed and molded the Med was eagerly awaiting what scientific discovery he would uncover. He grew excited just thinking about the possibilities, but quickly banished those thoughts and put his job ahead of all else. Upon closer inspection, the blood cells turned completely yellow and seemed rather spiky.

"What the..."

Adjusting the scope to see if he wasn't hallucinating, the Med took a closer look as the cells suddenly flipped over; reveiling the smiling faces of hundreds of Naruto's!

"GAAH!"

The other Med turned around to see what startled his partner, "What?! What happened?!", he exclaimed before rushing to the scene.

The Med on the telescope rose from his seat and massaged his temple, "I think I'm working too hard..."

"What in the fuck? No, no, I see them too. What in the Hell is goin-... Good God, they're Hop-scotch!", he shouted

"What?!?!"

Before both Med's could further study this anomoly, they heard a quickening beeping sound that never meant anything good. They both whipped their attention to the sleeping Naruto, only to see the boy in question shoot up into a sitting position.

"Note: In quantum mechanics, the complex square of wave-fuction is interpreted as the probable density and is associated with the portion's position!", Naruto blurted out at an incredible speed before his eye and face began to twitch wildly.

The Med Nin just stood there... looking VERY stupified as to what the fuck just happened, "... umm... Sure?"

After only milliseconds, Naruto collapsed back on the bed with a smile on his face... sound asleep. The Meds looked at teh boy with question, before checking his vitals one last time.

-

Back in the waiting room, Iruka and Sarutobi continued the nearly torturous wait. All was silent for a time; allowing both Nin to sort their thoughts out. Of course, this was cut short when a young female voice called from behind them.

"Um... I-Iruka-sensei...?", she called out.

Recognizing the voice almost immediately, Iruka turned around in his chair and saw the petite form of Hinata Hyuuga; going about her usual habit of pessing her index fingers. As usual, she looked nervous and shy, but what also stood out, was that the white of her eyes were reddened and she was wet. It was obvious that she had been running to the Hospital through the storm.

"Hinata? What are you doing here? Why aren't you at home?", Iruka questioned.

"I... I came to see... Naruto-kun...", she said with much worry, "Is... I-Is he..."

Damn... even she heard Naruto roars... and appearantly she was informed of what had happened here.

Before Iruka could mention anything of it, the emergency light of the Infirmary shut off; signifying the results of Naruto's treatment. Iruka rose from his seat; eagerly awaiting the stretcher that held his blonde student. The tension built up within all of them, even Sarutobi, as they waited to see what had become of the boy. Though they had every reason to fear the worst, they prayed for the best.

Finally... The moment of truth.

The double doors opened... and a stretcher rolled out into the open. One of the Medics pushed the stretcher while the other walked along side it; holding a clip-board. Once the stretcher was fully out in the open, it reveiled the peacfully sleeping form of Naruto. Hinata nearly fainted from the releif as the tension left her, but she was also eager to hear the results.

"Well...?", Iruka impatiently asked.

The Med with the clip board smiled, "You... are NOT going to beleive this, but Naruto has made a full recovery", he said.

Everyone was blown away with pure shock and utter disbeleif at this info. A full recovery? The guy was hit by a FUCKING lightening bolt! It shouldn't be possible. But of course, the possiblity that the Demon Fox within Naruto was responsible could've justified those means, so Sarutobi and Iruka let it go and excepted the releif of Naruto's survival. Hinata, on the other hand was inwardly jumping for absolute joy, but outwardly smiled with content as she stared at Naruto's sleeping form.

"How can that be?", the aged voice of Sarutobi asked; gaining everybody's attention, "Two and a half hours after a near-fatal lightening strike and he made full recovery?"

"H-Hai, Hokage-sama. All he needs now, is a little rest and he should be back on his feet in no ti-"

"DISNEY SUCKS!!! Shonen Jump RULES!!!!!", the sleeping form of Naruto blurted out with one fist erected in the air.

Everyone jerked their heads to Naruto with stupified and weary expressions on their faces, only to see the boy's fist plummet back where it was, before he began snoring peacfully.

"Umm... yes, well-"

Naruto: Cheese CAKE!!!"

"... ... Um-"

Naruto: LEMONS!!!!!!!!!!"

"... ... ... I-"

Naruto: DATTEBAYO!!!!!!

Everyone stared at the still sleeping Naruto for five minutes; awaiting another outburst. When nothing was heard, the Med Nin contined the conversation.

"Yes... Well, the boy was in horrendous shape when you brought him here. First degree burns all over his body, a raptured and shocked spinal cord; rendering paralysis from the neck down, and severe trauma to the heart and brain. Yet here he is; fully recovered and sleeping like a baby... ... a very spastic and unpredictable baby, but..."

Hm... with the looks on everyone's faces you'd think they didn't hear a damn word that was said, but in truth, everything had sunk in... but it STILL didn't add up.

Saurtobi stared at the blonde boy again, _"... It... It doesn't make sense. Whether the Kyuubi inside of him can generate healing prowess or not... this shouldn't have happened. No one could have made such a miraclulous recover in such a miniscule amount of time...", _he thought with great uncertainty.

Iruka was sharing similar thoughts, but was greatly releived for the most part, _"Damn... The kid must be somethin' else if he survived something like this. But... still the whole recovery deal doesn't add up. Somethin' on the wire here and somethin' tells me I'm gonna find out what it is sooner or later", _he thought with a subconscious smile on his face.

Hinata... Well she blushed, _"Naruto-kun... I swear, its like you're being watched by an angel...", _she thought as she gazed upon the peaceful form.

/\/\/\/\/\/\

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

The black robed God who took responsibility in watching the Pool of Visions smiled intently at the sight he beheld. In the Mortal world, Naruto was up and at 'em again, but it was different. He wasn't angry, but he was definately down-hearted. He had failed his final exams... again. At this rate, it was likely that he would never become a ninja. However, this black garbed God had other plans... now that his hunches have been confirmed.

"Mmmmhmhmhmhmhm-yeeeeees... He has the gift, indeed... Hmm... Naruto Uzumaki, huh? An unlikely canidate, to be sure, but as it stands, he was able to survive the Passage of Chaos. Yeeees... Maybe he will be the one... to do what I, myself, cannot", the dark God murmered to himself, before remembering something important, "Hm? Ahhhh... thats right. The boy has failed again. He'll most likey not see another exam for another year... but if it is to be, than he should grow accumstomed to his... new atributes as he grows..."

Upon watching Naruto nearly an hour further, he saw something that piqued his Chaosity- I mean, er... curiousity, "Wha-...? What's _he_ doing? I can see intent in his eyes... what could that mean?", he questioned as he continued to watch.

THAT IS of course, until the skys became ravaged by sudden bursts of lightening and thunder. The hooded deity lowered his head in dreaded realization.

"Oh, Gods... I FORGOT!!!", he griped, "Why do they invite him?!"

As if responsive to his word, a GIANT lightening bolt struck upon the ground a few feet away from the the black clad God; reveiling a large burley man with Norris attire.

**"I AM THOR; GOD OF THUNDER!", **he bellowed has he rested his humongous warhammer upon his shoulder, **"I AM HERE... FOR THE POKER TOURNEMENT!!!"**

"Yes yes, I who you are, Thor. The others are in the temple..."

**"AHH... MUCH ABLIGED, FUKYOUWAON! ONWARD TO VICTORY AND TWELVE PACKS OF CORONA!!!!!!", **Thor bellowed again before marching towards the entrance of the Temple behind Fukyouwaon.

The Dark God sighed before turning his attention back down to the Pool of Visions only to see the forms of Iruka and Naruto being attacked by the same white haired Chuunin that approached the blonde boy and told him about the Scroll of Sealing.

"Whoa... Looks like I missed out on alot... Better slow things up a bit", Fukyouwaon said before snapping his fingers.

In reaction to this, everything in the Pool of visions stopped... before back-tracking to earlier events. Fukyouwaon got pissed and kicked the rim of the Pool.

"NO! Not rewind, you peice o' shit!!", he screamed, "Damn... I swear we need to buy another one of these..."

-

Within the Temple of the Gods...

Zeus, Ganesh and Jesus where intently fixated upon there cards as they the heated Poker Match of the Gods raged on. The trio of deity shifted occasional glance to each other. After a heated stand off, Jesus layed down his hand.

"Read 'em and weep, boys!", he said as he layed down the one hand that no one can beat.

Ganesh and Zeus frowned deeply before laying their hands down in defeat, afterwhich, Jesus lounged forward and swiped all of the Poker Chips at the center of the table.

"Why de Hell do you keep winning?", Ganesh said in a STRONG Hindu acsent, "It doesn't make sense... Are you cheating _again_ you rotten bastard?"

Jesus raised and eyebrow, "Oh spare me. 'Thou shalt not bare false witness", remember?", he remarked.

Zeus leaned back in his chair and crossed his arms, "I noticed that you say that EVERYTIME you win... ... ... I think you're full of it, Jesus... Esspecially because of the fact that you just screwed up", he accused.

The Holy Spirit scoffed, "You can prove nothing", he said; crossing his arms and lifting his head in the air.

"There are only four Aces in a deck of cards... you laid five...", Zeus mentioned, with a knowing frown.

Jesus' arms lowered as his face grew blank.

"I KNEW IT! You cheating BASTARD! What de Hell is wrong you?! You call yourself a noble Holy Spirit when you can't even follow your own damn Commenments?!?!", Ganesh barked.

Jesus opened his mouth to retort, when all of the sudden, the double-doors to the room were shattered open reveiling a familiar Norris God.

**"GREETINGS FELLOW GODS!!! I, THOR, GOD OF THUNDER, HAVE ARRIIIIIIIVED!!!!! AND NOW... WE DO POKER**!!!!!!!!!!", Thor roared before opening the side of his warhammer, puuling out a twelve pack of beer and closed his weapon**, "I'VE GOT THE CORONA!!!!!!"**

Zeus sighed and closed his eyes, "Thor just shut the Hell up, get over here and cut the cards", he said.

Blinking twice, Thor walked over to the table while dragging his massive hammer. Taking his seat among the other Gods, Thor slipped on a Poker cap with the words Thor soed into them and held his hand out.

**"CARDS**!", he said with his natural godly demeanor that he could not seem to calm down.

Jesus handed him the cards and he started pulling all of this crazy, fancy and damn-near impossible card menuvers; flipping, sliding, strafing and shuffling them with pure and unhindered ease. Once he finished, Thor set the cards down in a perfectly centered deck before shooting up from his seat; sending the chair flying out of the picture. He then lifted his mighty Hammer into the air and released a thundering war-cry.

"NO, THOR! NOOOO!!!!!!!", the oth Gods hollered in unison.

-

Fukyouwaon was drinking in the gorious and yet highly unlikely seen of what he beheld within the Pool of Visions.

"Ahhhh... How glorious. It would appear that young Naruto will be getting his chance to be a shinobi afterall...

**CRAAAAASSSSSHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!**

"... ... ... The bad news is that my fellow Gods are complete dunder-heads..."

Jesus: Dad DAMMIT! WHY DO WE INVITE HIM?!?!?!?

* * *

**_And THAT'S THAT! I hope that this very well entertained all of you in the best possible way. And if you thought that this was good, than I can only say this... YOU AIN'T SEE SHIT!!!!!!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	3. Interesting Developments

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_Yeah... I have nothing very important or life-altering to say right now, sooooo... _**

**_Lets get on with the Chaos..._**

* * *

Chapter Three: Interesting Develpoments

* * *

The morning sun peeled its brilliance from behind the great mountain; shedding the awakening light upon Konoha ever so slowly. Sunrise was always the best time of the morning to whomever was awake to see it. Luckily for Naruto, the shine of the sun is exactly what awoke him from a well-deserved slumber. Fully rested and energized, the blonde 'Genin' sat up on his bed with a cheshure smile embedded upon his whiskered face. The beautiful orange glow of the sun is exactly what Naruto needed to feel complete, but this feeling was only magnified with the memory of the facts. 

The Doof was FINALLY a Ninja!

Naruto stretched his joints with several refreshing crackles echoing out in his room. The pajamaed boy jumped from his bed and started stretching his muscles to loosen up a bit more. HOWEVER, upon leaning his back to the side to stretch his obliques, his spine completely snapped into a 90 degree angle.

"GRRAAWRORROAAA!!!!!!!!", he writhed in pure, unadultrated agony.

With all feeling in his legs gone, Naruto's head plummeted to the ground; rendering his body in the shape of a triangle. Skrieking and reeling with the worst pain he has ever experienced, Naruto's face scrunched up in the most comical expression of anguish with his eyes shrinking to dots and gritting his teeth together so damn hard that they actually cracked and sanded away. In a random moment of pure chaos, Naruto's body was prapelled off of the floor before crashing back down; his back and teeth perfectly unfazed.

The pine apple haired Genin stared at the ceiling of his room with a VERY incredulous look stuck on his face; only able to utter a single that best suited this moment of complete randomness.

"... What?????????????..."

------

Konoha Academy...

There were ten minutes remaining until all of the students who graduated were assigned to their new teams. Normally, Naruto would be beside himself with glee, but due to events of earlier that morning, he was at a stand with confusion; his fingers raked within his messy blonde hair. One row of seats above sat a young violet haired girl named Hinata, who was very releived that her long-time crush was among those who graduated.

_"Oh... Naruto-kun... He graduated after all... but... he seems troubled about something", _Hinata rationalized.

Naruto was ripped from his thoughts by the perpetually bored voice of Shikamaru Nara.

"Hey... what are _you_ doing here? Don't you remember; the Academy only has class for those who _graduated", _the lathargic stradegist said.

In an avrivated response, Naruto slowly creaked his head up to face Shikamaru, "... Do you see this?", he asked irritantly while pointing to his Konoha head-band.

Shikamaru looked at Naruto's head-band and widened his eyes with surprise. The orange clad ninja kept his finger pointed to his band.

"Do you _see_ this?", Naruto repeated with a little more agrivated force gaining a nod from Shikamaru, "Good... So whattdya say you take your lazy pony-tailed ass out of my sight before I-... ... ... Sorry... I just had a very weird morning...", he appologized.

The black haired genin released a dissmissive yawn, "Ah, whatever...", he said with absolute un... caring... ness.

Once Shikamaru was gone to his seat, Naruto rested his head upon his desk and sighed, "Kuso... I so don't feel like seeing anyone right now... Too much on the brain-"

BUT(!) as Fate would have it, the forms of Ino Yamanaka and Naruto's long-time crush, Sakura Haruno came barging into the room; breathing heavily with looks of irritated exsaust upon their faces.

"I WIN!!!", both girls declared in unison.

While Ino and Sakura were going on about their worthless competiton of speed, Naruto turned around and saw the object of his affections; blushing like mad.

_"Hehehehe... Well, maybe I can stand the company of just one person", _Naruto thought to himself as he marveled at Sakura's flawless (in his misguided eyes) form.

After staring like an idiot, Naruto noticed Sakura scanning the area as though she were looking for something. After a few seconds, she seemed to turned in the blonde's direction before she smiled with delight. Naruto saw this and tried to avert his gaze.

_"Hohohoh man... She's staring right at me... Damn she's hot!", _he thought (in his own flawed opinion).

As if on cue, the pink haired kunoichi ran to his direction and down the stairs; giggling like the fan-girl she was. Taking this as a positive adress to him, Naruto stood up and waved in a friendly manner.

"Oh, Good Morning, Sakura-chan! Wanna sit next to m-", before Naruto could finish his sentence, he was carelessly pushed aside as Sakura intoduced herself to Sasuke Uchiha, who happened to be sitting next to Naruto at that time.

"Oh, hello, Sasuke-kun! Can I... sit next to you?", she asked in a sweet tone gaining a blank look of annoyance from the Uchiha.

Naruto (the poor guy) plummeted over his desk and cart-wheel flipped down the entire row at the very SECOND someone had pulled their seat back to sit down. Unfortunately for Naruto, he made contact with that very same chair... crushing his Family Jewels with a sickening crackling, smashing and grinding noise that caught everyone's attention. As Naruto gaped his mouth open, he released a screeching gasp of absolute agony as his buldging, blood-shot eyes rolled to the back of his head before he fell over to the side.

The person who was PARTIALLY responsible for this was none other than... some random student, who simply stared down at Naruto with a blank face.

"Damn... Why'd you get in the way?", he carlessly questioned.

Shooting a glare at the guy, Naruto struggled to his feet; attempting to avoid the inevitable pain that would shoot through his loins in any way possible.

"What... the HELL-gah... are you-oaw... talking about?! You're the one would put-raoaw... the chair in the-dargh... way!", he growled as he held his bruised Pride in his hands.

Without really waiting for a response, Naruto slowly cracked his head up to see Sakura and a whole bunch of other fangirls gathering around to argue about who would be more suited to sit next to _Sasuke_. The guy next to the blonde genin was obviously talkin' mad shit to him, but Naruto didn't seem to notice since he was far to fixated on a sight that made him rather irritated.

Then... something weird happened.

Naruto's right arm began to tremble uncontrolably. And I mean really tremble! The orange clad boy looked down at his shaking arm with surprise when all of the sudden, his hand shot forward with lightening quick speed and latched itself on the shirt of the jerk in front of him and lifted him off of his feet!

"WHAT THE-", Naruto exclaimed before he inadvertantly threw the guy like a dart on collision-course with the side of Sakura's face, "Sweet Fuck! Sakura-chan look OUT!"

CONTACT!!!!!!!

With a loud and severely comical crash, Sakura and the unfortunate soul went tumbling UP(!) the stairs until they both smashed into the wall; completely and totally unconscious. The entire room grew silent and Naruto had this ridiculous look of astonishment on his face before he looked at his arm again. He didn't take much time to marvel at what he just did, because the many weary looks he was getting from EVERYONE... except Sakura and the guy who was thrown into her...

They were fuckin' knocked.

"IT WASN'T ME!!! HONEST! It was my arm; it just... acted on it's own! Watch!!", Naruto declared before he lifted his right arm with his left and dropped it with no intention of easing it's fall; letting it fall limply to his side, "... Well it was a SECOND AGO! Stop staring at me like I'm some kinda freak! I... AM **NOT A FREAK!!!!!!!**"

Upon his words, Naruto raised his right arm; curling his fist when a sudden jolt of electricity. The blonde genin reflexably flipped his arm back; constantly shifting his glance from side to side.

"... What's happening to me?", he whispered to himself.

Ten minutes later...

Iruka arrived to the scene and whistled the class into order. Sitting down in their respective seats, the students awaited their Sensei's words.

"Excellent. Everyone is here. I'd like to start off by congratulating each and every one of you for your accomplishments. As of today, you are all Genin; full-fledged Ninja. Now then... as shinobi of Konoha you will all be assigned to teams of three. Mind you; we have verified the formations of the teams in terms of compared skill level and such. I will call them out now."

_"Hmm... Teams of three, huh?", _Sakura and Ino thought in unison before exchanging challenging glances to one another.

Ino (who sat next to Shikamaru) looked down at her pink haired rival (who sat in between a vastly confused Naruto and Sasuke) and smiled misceiviously.

"Teams of three... I wonder who'll be with Sasuke-kun...", the blonde female said.

Sakura glared back at Ino, "I don't know...", she replied.

**_"CHA!!! Don't act so smug, ya little Bitch! Keep thinking you'll beat me to Sasuke-kun's heart and I'll rip your balls off!!!", _**Inner Sakura declared.

Naruto definately heard what had been said, but he was far too wrapped up in his... problems to really acknowledge it.

-**SIX TEAM-CALLS LATER**-

"Team 7... ... Naruto Uzumaki... Sakura Haruno", Iruka announced.

Sakura's face darkened with a grimace as she lowered her head in defeat, "Good greif... I'm with _Naruto_?", she said.

"And Sasuke Uchiha", Iruka finished, causing Sakura to shoot from her seat; roaring a happy cheer with her fists swung in the air.

Though Naruto would normally cheer for Sakura's company and detest Sasuke's presence, he wasn't particularly in any position to care... he was still checking his arm out to see if he COMPELTELY missed something.

"Right, right-With Sakura-chan and Sasuke-teme (grumble) (grumble)", he murmured with little interest.

Sakura turned back to face her blonde rival, Ino and flipped the bird at her, **_"CHA!!! In your FACE, BITCH!!!!", _**Inner Sakura roared with delight.

Ino balled her fists and glared at Sakura; cursing her and the sheer unfairness of it all, "Ooohhh!! Why do _you_ get to be with Sasuke-kun?!", she questioned with much contempted.

Hinata, on the other hand, was severly disappointed, _"I'm... I'm not on the same team as Naruto-kun...", _she inwardly greived, before hearing the words 'Team 8' and her name being called along with the names of Kiba Inuzuka and Shino Aburame.

When Sakura turned back to face her Sensei, Ino was still fuming, "Dammit... Its not fair", she complained; gaining a sigh for Shikamaru.

"Honestly, what the Hell could be so life-fullfiling about being with some... some guy?", the lazy genin questioned.

Ino frowned at the boy before leaning on her desk, "Jeez... How can you not tell? Don't you know anything, Shikamaru?", she said with a shrug.

"Well that all depends... Do I look like a girl... no... I don't", Shikamaru responded.

The blonde kunoichi stared at Shikamaru for a moment before sighing, "I'll never understand you... I hope I don't get stuck with _you_ as my teammate...", she said.

As if on cue to her words, Iruka called out the names of the Genin that would form Team 10, "Ino Yamanaka... Shikamaru Nara...", he announced.

Ino's eyes dulled out and Shikamaru released a smug laugh, "Looks like you're stuck with me after... Not that I'm enjoying the situation any more than you, but still... Ha... ha", he taunted; gaining a growl from his new blonde partner.

"And Chouji Akimichi", Iruka finished.

Hearing those last words tore it all up for Ino as she sunk into her seat, _"Good God, man. You're sticking me with the walking garbage-disposal too? What did I ever do to you?"_

------

Meanwhile, outside of Academy walls...

Sakura spent a portion of her time searching for a certain Uchiha, who had just been assigned to her team (much to her delight). To her, she had looked everywhere and hadn't seen him since. Sakura's search led her to a beautiful stone path; maticulously decorated with lush vegetation; perfect for a little R and R.

"Sasuke-kun!", Sakura called out for what had to be hundredth time, "Oh... Where could he be...? I thought that maybe he'd be eager to spend a little time together since we're gonna be on the same team. (sigh) Guess I'll keep looking...", she said.

Before the pink haired female continued her calls, a familiar and HIGHLY irritating voice called from behind her. Sakura immediately plastered a frown upon her face before she turned to face him.

"Hey Sakura-chan! We should eat lunch together. You know; seen as how were gonna be on the same team and all. Care to join me?", he asked with his usual foxy grin.

Sakura looked him over and scoffed, "Two things... First, why do I have to eat with _you_? Second, don't think you can make a habit by asking me out just because we're on the same team. And third, where do you get off thinking you can just talk to me after what you did, you big jerk?!", she spat.

Naruto's vision averted to the sky as he traced three of his fingers in confusion; mouthing the words 'one', 'two' and 'three'. Shaking his head to rid himself of that meaningless confusion, Naruto stared at Sakura with eyes that begged for understanding.

"No! I'm so sorry, Sakura-chan! I didn't mean to, honest! My arm just moved; I had no control for some reason!", Naruto protested; waving his arms forward.

"Oh, I see. So you're saying that you arm just HAPPENED to develope a mind of it's own and acted with your concent?", Sakura asked with a knowing frown.

Naruto smiled, "EXACTLY!! No wonder you got such good grades at school Sakura-chan!", he said with full and unrestrained honesty.

A vein began to pulsate on Sakura's forehead when she heard this, "Are you mocking me?!", she barked, causing Naruto's smile to completely vanish.

"What? Of course not, Sakura-chan! I'd never-"

"Baka no!!! Your annoying, Naruto! Just shut up and get out of my sight!!", Sakura yelled.

In a moment of pure spontanious disorder, Naruto's physical form was INSTANTLY flashed into a pile of dust, which was slowly blown away by a burst of wind. Sakura blinked twice as she tried to prossess what had just happened. After a minute she decided that she was probably hallucinating, shrugged it off and continued her search for Sasuke.

-

Meanwhile, atop the balcony of... some place...

Ino, Shikamaru and Couji were enjoying a relaxing moment of peace; eating some delectable rice-balls. Shikamaru, who was seated at the foot of the balcony, sighed lazily before swallowing a bite of his rice-ball.

"You know what...? Now that I think about it, its an uncanny coinsedence that all of us were assigned to the same team. Wouldn't you agree?", he said; trying to spark up a conversation.

Ino, who leaned against the rail of the balcony simple scoffed, "Whether it is or not, God must hate me for sticking me with you two. Listen, now that we _are_ a team, you're gonna follow my lead and do what I say, got it?", she commanded.

Couji looked up at Ino, "Sure... as long as if involves barbequed pork", he said hungrily.

Ino lowered her head into one of her hands and sighed in exsasperation. All of the sudden they all heard the feint sound of someone screaming. The voice was distant but was steadily getting louder... louder... louder... LOUDER...

**CCRRRAASSSSSSHHHH**!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The form of Naruto smashed unto the balcony where InoxShikaxChou were relaxing. The team stared down at Naruto with stunned and shocked faces; wondering if what they were seeing was an hullucination brought on by a drug that could have been in the rice-balls.

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS..._**

Fukyouwaon was intently peering into the Pool of Visions; taking in all that he was seeing.

"Ahhhh... yes. Things are delevoping quite nicely... quiker than I origanally thought actually. Soon... oh yes, very soon. Young Naruto will fulfill his destiny and spread the seeds of Chaos throughout the world... All he has to do... his unlock his new potential... and then...

The first Chaos Knight in ten thousand years will be born..."

* * *

**_Excellent... On a personal note, I can't say that I'm happy about where I ended this chapter, either, but I am sure that I was able to entertain you guys a bit with Naruto's... Interesting Developments. Heheheh... Nothing left to say here, except. EXPECT MORE CHAOS!!!!!!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	4. Interesting Developments prt 2

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

_**GREETINGS!!!!! Are you READY for CHAOS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?! (insert furious roar of thunder) Then BOW DOWN TO ME, YOU MERE CRICKETS IN THE BUSH!!!!!!!! For I will not tolerate anything orderly, right, impressionable, just, appropriate, non-chaotic, or otherwise anything so honorably odious that it can be deemed as PLEASANT (tounge twists into knot)!!!!! (ar-hem) Now... with that being said...**_

**_Chaos... Join me..._**

**_PS: If none of you can remember where I left off, then read the last part of the chapter from the giant CCCRRRRAAAASHHHHH!!!!! Thank-you..._****_

* * *

_**

Interesting Developments: prt. 2

* * *

After amazingly regaining his senses in a matter of seconds, Naruto found himself engaged in a... weird conversation with InoxShikaxChou as they were all now seated upon the rail of the balcony. Although Couji, Naruto and Shikamaru grew up together, they hadn't really talked to each other much. Suddenly sparking up this random conversation was some what of a... revelation in terms of where they stood. The weird thing was that Naruto was asking for relationship advice... 

"So you were rejected again... Whats the big diff?", Shikamaru said in his usual uncaring manner; sitting next to Naruto.

The Genin in orange sighed, "The big diff is that she did more than just reject me. It's like she hates me now. I just wanted to have some lunch with her and she totally bit my head. What am I doing wrong?", he said.

"You're a loud-mouth...", Chouji blurted out of the blue, "... and I think she's a lesbian-"

At his last words Chouji quickly slapped his hands around his mouth in complete and utter astonishment at what just came out of it. Amazingly, he just blurted it out without consciously moving his lips to speak. In shock, Shikamaru, Naruto and Ino nearly fell off of the rail before shooting incredulous glances at the portly Genin.

"You... are a Grade-A nut-case... But in the uncanny event of you actually being right, would that make Sasuke a-"

InoxShikaxChouxNaru: NNNNOOOOO!!!!!!!!!

Urged with the need to shift this conversation back to a... straighter direction, Ino intervened, "Okay, okay, okay. So Sakura rejected you. Why do you think that is...?", she asked.

When she didn't get an immediate response, the blonde kunoichi looked over to Naruto and saw that he was viciously glaring at something... or someone. Ino raised an eyebrow as she stared at her fellow blonde.

"Whats got _you_ in such a good mood?", she asked in a haughty fashion.

Shikamaru saw Naruto's glare and tried to trace his line of sight only to see Sasuke standing near the window of an opposing building; chewing on a rice-ball. After repeatedly sifting glance after glance from Naruto to Sasuke, Shikamaru waved his hand in front of the blonde boy's face to get his attention; all the while maintaining his hilariously blank expression. As the lazy genin continued his antics, Ino and Chouji were in a brief side conversation; talking quiet enough to conceal their words.

"What do you thinks up with Naruto. Usually he's a big, loud mouthed, knuckle-brained moron, but now he seems... a little distant-and what's with the murderous glare", Ino said.

Chouji finished the last of his chips and sighed, "I don't know... but he's sorta freakin' me out. Then again, I guess thats what happens when someone you've been after for a long time brushes you off like bread crumbs on your lap... I'm hungry...", he said.

Ino sighed and lowered her head, "Chouji, are you always hung-

**_CRUNCH_**!!!!!!

Shikamaru: GRRRWWAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!

This sudden screaming was a great startlement for Ino and Chouji as they looked over to see Naruto unconsciously crunching, biting and gnawing on the side of Shikamaru's index finger with the same demonic glare directed in Sasuke's direction. As the angry blonde Genin continued his unintentional assault, Shikamaru was shifting, twitching, cringing, and grunting at each wave of unimaginable pain that coursed through his hand.

"NaaaAARuto! Yo-YOU-arrrraAAArre EATING MY HAND!!!!", the black haired boy shouted in agony.

Hearing his Friends voice, Naruto shot his eyes down to see that he was tearing into the flesh of his finger. The orange clad blonde let out a comical yelp as he withdrew from the bleeding finger; spitting profusely to rid himself of the detestable flavor in his mouth. Sikamaru shot his hand back and glared at his finger with pure unrestrained anguish; lacing his lips together as he did so.

"SORRY! Sorry, I... don't know what came over me! I just-"

"Your just REAL TROUBLESOME, thats what you are!!!! You nearly ATE my FINGER!!!", Shikamaru shouted.

Naruto waved his hands in front of himself apologetically, "I'm sorry-I'm sorry! I've just had a weird and bad day! Especially with Sasuke-that flaming prick! Why does he always get in the way?!", he mildly hollered.

Hearing this, Ino's head suddenly perked up as her mind began to race. It was at that moment that she instantly concocted a plan that was sure to help her gain what she desired... But she needed... a genie pig. With her usual impulsive self, the bleach-blonde female hopped back unto the balcony, snatched Naruto by the collar and dragged him to the other side and dropped him on his ass. Startled by this sudden outburst, Naruto blinked twice before looking at Ino, who knelt down beside him.

"Naruto... You're alone right?", she whispered.

The blonde boy nodded.

"Annnd you wanna be with someone... right?"

"Wow... Are you, like... totally hitting on me, Ino?", Naruto said with an awkward blush and grin.

Ino flinched back with a blush of her own before reeling her fist back to crush the skull of the idiot who just uttered that ridiculous assumption but restrained herself greatly and responded with a simple yet clearly strained, 'No'.

"I have a plan to get you with Sakura, you imbecile. But you'll have to be quick", Ino informed.

At hear the words 'to get you with Sakura', Naruto nearly blew a vein with the excitement that filled him at that moment. So he lent Ino his ears and listened to what the coniving bitch had to say.

Back upon the rail, Chouji was looking at the gaping wound on Shikamaru's finger with a pitiable expression.

"Damn, Shika. That's disgusting...", the large nin commented; gaining a look of sheer irritation from his friend.

"I bet you wouldn't be so... _cheerful_ if you were in my position", Shikamaru said in his usually calm and bored demeanor.

Suddenly, out of nowhere, the lazy Genin's hair started to surge with VERY light sparks of electricity, much to Chouji's surprise.

"Uuuuh, Shika?"

"What..."

"A-Are you... feeling alright..."

Shikamaru sighed, "Half of my finger was nearly bitten off by a rabid monkey with a chomping addition. What do you think?", he snarked.

Without warning of any particular kind, Shikamaru's hair released one last jolt of electricity before flapping out into a HUGE, full Afro-puff! Chouji nearly screamed like a bitch whn he saw this but merely contained his surprise by pointing a shaky finger in the direction of the joke of cosmetology.

"Sh... Sh-Sh... Shika...maru... Your hair..."

"What... What about my hair", he said as he lifted his hand to check on his hair, thus feeling something horribly out of place, "The HELL?!"

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

"What in the-... I don't believe this. His overall power is completely dorment. Yet he was already able to branch the Essence of Chaos to another... Hmmmmmmhahahahahah... So it begins again...", Fukyouwaon said as he gandered upon the Pool of Visions.

As time went on, the black robed God of Chaos watched the events below with great intent when he saw Naruto attack Sasuke

"Yikes! A Chaos-moment, perhaps? No... He seemed a little too fixated on striking. He must be planning something-ooooohhhhh, foiled in his attempts. Well, you may be a Ninja now but you still have a long way to g-... Oh you clever son of a bitch. Using the Kage Bushin so... usefully. I'm impressed, but I don't see the point in you using the Henge Technique, let alone why you'd actually want to look like that prick... Hmm... What are you up to, Boy?"

Upon further speculation of the surrounding area, Fukyouwaon noticed a certain bleach-blond female staring intently at the Henged Naruto (Sasuke). Her eyes were filled with so much anticipation that it sparked the dark God's curiouity even more.

"Dammit... this is getting good. And its ONLY gonna get better from here; I can tell..."

------

Back in the Mortal World...

Sakura had FINALLY decided to stop looking for Sasuke and decided to rest herself upon a stone bench; carrying a package of food.

"Jeez... I even made lunch for him and I still can't find him. Oh well... maybe I'll get lucky enough for him to just show up right in front of me", Sakura said to herself as her chin fell into her hands.

After only a couple of seconds, the pink haired Genin's mind was suddenly riddled with fantasies about a certain Uchiha; what with the meaningless dribbles of how much he wants to kiss her beautifully large forehead and all that which rather bullshit.

Sakura sighed in disappointment, "I so wish... Like something like _that_ would ever happen... Especially with my forehead the size it is. Add that to the fact that my body in looks is below average... If I'm ever gonna get a real chance, I have to work even harder if I to win his heart and I won't give up", she said to herself.

Just then, she felt the presence of another; a familiar presence. She looked straight ahead of her to see Sasuke leaning against a tree; staring at her with a confident smile. Needless to say, this got a deep blush from the jade eyed female before she tried to avert her gaze.

_"Oh... Sasuke-kun is staring right at me. Wow... his eyes are full of such intensity", _she thought before her face fell a bit, _"'Course, he could just be pondering about how I was born with such a grotesque looking forehead..."_

"Sakura...", Sasuke called out; snapping the pink haired kunoichi out of her thoughts, "Your forehead is so wide and beautiful... It almost makes me feel like kissing it..."

Sakura blushed madly at the reanactement of one of her ridiculous fantasies as she stared at the object of her desires.

"...But I won't... that's the dimmwitted thing Naruto would do...", the black-haired Uchiha mentioned before taking a seat next to Sakura who sighed with disappointment.

"Yeah... I guess", she said in a somewhat down-hearted fashion.

After a VERY breif moment of silence, Sasuke cleared his throat, "So Sakura, about that Naruto... what do you think of him...?", he asked without much hesitation.

Surprisingly, Sakura answered after only a short pause, "Hmph. What do I think of Naruto? I think he's a bothersome pest", she snarked.

"A... pest?"

"Yeah... He enjoys getting in the way and making me suffer through his stupid antics. He talks about how much he likes me and it's obvious by his pitiable attempts to ask me out. But what he doesn't seem to understand is that all he manages to do here is make my life miserable with his presence; I can't stand him", Sakura said with waining in the slightest.

Hearing all of this, Sasuke's face completely averted to the ground; slowly shifting from surprised... to generally irritated.

"That Naruto... all he knows how to do is get in the way of my affections..."

(Sasuke's posture droops)

"He doesn't know the first thing about me..."

(Sasuke's posture droops)

"... He's just annoying..."

(Sasuke's posture once again droops)

After getting all of that off of her chest, Sakura's blush reappeared, "All I want... is for you to accept me, Sasuke-kun...", she continued dreamily.

a slight scowl embedded itself upon Sasuke's face before he looked up at Sakura who was smiling at him with her eyes filled with desire and longing... He didn't budge.

"To be accepted, huh...", he murmered to nobody but himself.

Not catching that fact, Sakura responded by closing her eyes and leaning forward to the Uchiha, "Yes... that's all I want... All I'll ever need...", she said.

The young Sharingan wielder suddenly felt a... twinge of some kind pierce through his heart without mercy. It was slightly painful and Sasuke was unable to keep his face from cringing from the sensation. Metaphorically, it felt as though his heart was bleeding as he could he his steady pulse quickening. Then... he felt discusted.

"Please... I'm desperate...", Sakura said whole-heartedly; discusting Sasuke a little further.

The spikey haired Genin's scowl suddenly became as plain as day, _"Alright Naruto, Pop-quiz... What have you learn today...? ... ... That I'll probably spend the rest my life asking myself what I ever saw in this bitch...? ... ... ... Yeah... that pretty much sums it all up in one go. So whats say you remove yourself from the premises before she lays her Sasuke-lustin' lips upon you...", _he thought rather crudely.

With that last thought, 'Sasuke' rose from his seat, stashed his hands in his pocket and walked off in another direction. Sakura noticed something amiss, opened her eyes and saw her so-called love walking away from her.

"S-Sasuke-kun. Where are you going?"

"For a walk...", he bluntly responded.

Eventhough the moment (if you even wanna call it that) was completely trashed, Sakura simply blushed again and deduced that 'Sasuke' was just really shy. An amussing bit for the jade eyed female; it was, and she had every intention on waiting for him to return so that they could continue where they left off. So she did just that...

-

As 'Sasuke' walked along the stone path; guided by lush vegitation, he was suddenly snatched and yanked into one of the bushes. After hitting the floor, 'Sasuke' looked up and immediately saw the frowning face of Ino.

"Naruto! What the Hell was that?! The only thing you did right was incapacitate Sasuke-kun and do this stupid Henge!", she barked.

As if responsive to Ino's words, 'Sasuke' was suddenly engulfed by a poof of smoke; later revieling him to in fact be... Naruto (honestly, who did NOT see this coming). The blonde Genin kept the same empty scowl as he did when he took Sasuke's form.

"Hn. There wasn't any need... I know how Sakura-chan feels about me; I heard it with my own two ears. So I don't need to go with this plan of yours. Thanks anyway, Ino", Naruto siad.

Eventhough she had absolutely no reason to, Ino was getting really pissed, "Thanks anyway...? THANKS ANYWAY?!?!? I never SAID this was for _you_, DAMMIT!!", she howled.

Naruto scoffed, "From where I was standing, you actually did... but I kinda figured out that you wanted me to insult the living Hell out of Sakura-chan so she could hate Sasuke; leaving you without a ounce of competition. While at the same time, I could have a better chance of getting to know her better. Honestly, you didn't have to say anything cause it was totally obvious what your reasons were", he said with such an astounding level of indifference that Ino nearly busted a vein trying to keep her temper in check.

The blue eyed boy rose to his feet and brushed himself off, "Besides, whether you did this for you and only you or not, you did help me realize something before it was to late. Truth is, I don't blame either of you... Thank you Ino", he said with surprising sencerity that caught his fellow blonde off gaurd competely.

Ino hesitated for a moment; staring at Naruto for a brief moment, "... Just... Just go away...", she said; waving a dissmissive hand.

Without really responding, Naruto simply turned around, walked out of the bushes and continued along the path he was going before he was so RUDELY interuppted; completely oblivious to a certain Uchiha who was walking in the complete opposite direction. Now that she was left with her thoughts, Ino was starting to fume again.

_"Dammit! I'm right back where I started now. Forehead still likes Sasuke-kun and I'm no closer from sweeping the rug from under her feet. It's all Naruto-baka's fault!", _she thought furiously to herself.

Somehow, when her anger reached it's previous peak, it suddenly dropped when she thought about Naruto; the look on his face when Sakura said those things about him for one thing. Even though there was a scowl on his face, Ino could tell that NAruto had just been heart-broken and she knew from personal experience that heart-break ain't nothin' to sniff at. But the fact that he pretty much shoved her back into the pit she was already in was irritating. She tried to get angry; honest to the Gods she did, but she just... couldn't. She just involved someone in a stupid little plot of hers only to unintentionally destroy any hopes of gaining recognition from the girl he really liked. Top that off with the fact that she was pretty much a total bitch to him herself; snapping at him like he did something wrong, then telling him to hit the road after he was decent enough to thank her.

_"God, I'm such a bitch. Great, Ino... Just great..."_

-

Sakura eagerly awaited the return of Sasuke, whom she was SO close to actually kissing. Just the thought of her lips touching his was enough to make her heart beat through her chest. To her, the heat in her chest never died out after that moment and she waited and waited for the chance to finish where she started. As if her dreams were suddenly starting to come true, Sasuke did indeed return, but he looked as though he were far more intent on looking for something then kissing his biggest fan-girl...

Not that Sakura noticed, but...

"Oh! Sasuke-kun, you're back. Hee hee hee... Are you ready to continue where we left off?", she ask in a overly innocent routine (which she seems to think works on guys like Sasuke)

Without actually giving her eye-contact, Sasuke responded as he shot his gaze unto many different parts of the area, "Where's Naruto...", he asked coldly.

Hearing that name again, Sakura's demeanor completely changed from intent and ready, to haughty and somewhat arrogant, "Oh, that idiot? I don't know; he's probably pulling his usual bullshit. You know; pranks, jokes, that kind of which rather. I tell you it's like the boy has no humility what so ever... Thats it! I bet I know what his problem is. Did you know that he doesn't even have any parents?", she said.

Sasuke ceased his search and glared at Sakura because of the attitude she was carrying at that moment.

"Yeah! That's why he's such a delinquent; because he has no parents to teach him right, no rule or boundries. He's aaall alone and if you ask me, he deserves it. Damn, if my parents ever saw me doing half of the shit he pulls, they'd whoop my ass. I'd never be caught doing anything _he_ does. He's just-"

"-Alone... Isolated... Yeah...", Sasuke interviened; gaining a look of sudden look doubt from Sakura.

"Huh? Whats wrong?", she asked with worry.

Sasuke showed his back to Sakura as he felt that he could no longer look at the bitch, "Whats wrong? Hmph. You have no idea, do you? You have no _idea_ what it means to be alone and you have the nerve to act like you know everything about him, don't you?", he said.

Sakura began to grow worried that she had done something wrong (the bitch is just THAT oblivious), "Sasuke-kun... why are you so angry?", she asked; realizing that the 'moment' was the officially dead.

Sasuke whirled his head back around one last time, "Because you're annoying..."

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

Fukyouwaon laughed a good and hardy chordle, "HA!!!!! Crash and Burn, ya stuck up bitch!!!!!!", he bellowed.

* * *

**_There ya have it, people! After a long wait chapter four of the indomidable Chaos... HAS BEEN POSTED!!!! I hope that I'm not boring you with my mayhem but I simply MUST get these thoughts on the net! I have been thinking a lot about where I can take this story, because believe or not... this drabble does have plot... Well, with that being said, GOOD BYE!!!! BRAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!!!!!!!!!_**


	5. A Chaotic Day For Everyone

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_'Kay, Folks. From here on out, as I'm sure many of you were able to guess, the story shall take a few twists and turns in my own Chaotic function. I think it'd be safe to assume that a few things may be a bit over board... but I'm gonna try and make this as clear as I POSSIBLY can... That's the point... You'll see what I mean as you read and I can at least garuntee that you'll get plenty of laughs throughout the Mayhem. So then..._**

**_Chaos... will be Chaos..._**

**_

* * *

_**

Chapter 5: A Chaotic Day For Everyone

* * *

_"-Alone... Isolated... Yeah...", Sasuke interviened; gaining a look of sudden look doubt from Sakura._

_"Huh? Whats wrong?", she asked with worry._

_Sasuke showed his back to Sakura as he felt that he could no longer look at the bitch, "Whats wrong? Hmph. You have no idea, do you? You have no idea what it means to be alone and you have the nerve to act like you know everything about him, don't you?", he said._

_Sakura began to grow worried that she had done something wrong (the bitch is just THAT oblivious), "Sasuke-kun... why are you so angry?", she asked; realizing that the 'moment' was the officially dead._

_Sasuke whirled his head back around one last time, "Because you're annoying..."_

****

_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_

_Fukyouwaon laughed a good and hardy chordle, "HA!!!!! Crash and Burn, ya stuck up bitch!!!!!!", he bellowed._

------

The Campus Restroom...

Naruto was sitting upon the toilet; thinking very, very hard. He was just dealt what felt like 21 low-blow with a nailed-bat by someone who he really cared care. In truth, however, the blonde Genin had every intention of carrying out Ino's little plan; regardless of how obviously selfish it was, but he figured, 'Ah, what the Hell". He believed that his little question could open the door for getting to know Sakura a little better. Instead, he recieved nothing but heart-ache. Naruto wasn't a complete idiot; he knew that Sakura thought he could be annoying at times and didn't alway desire his company. But now that he'd heard MORE than enough of what she really felt, every ounce of his drive to capture her heart has been destroyed...

completely and utterly.

"I can't believe this... I never thought I'd say this but... what a _bitch_! Why is it always the pretty ones with sparkling personalities?", Naruto conversed to himself.

Thinking a little deeper into it, the blonde Genin started to get a bit down-hearted, "Dammit... I kick someone's ass to gain another's affection and this is what happens... Good grief; I better find Sasuke and start confessin' a few things...", he thought to himself a bit solemnly.

At that last thought, Naruto took care of the rest of his buisness, rose from the seat, washed his hands and walked out of the restroom. However, as he made his way back to class, the orange-clad Genin was confronted by a frowning Sasuke. Naruto smiled nervously.

"Ohoooo... Sasuke! You made it out of my knot, I see...", he said in a pitiable attempt to sound humble.

The young Uchiha frowned even more, "Hmph. A two year-old could find a way out of that knot, idiot. You really didn't pay that much attention in class did you", he said with a fient growl to his voice.

It was at these words that Naruto suddenly looked depressed and ashamed, "No... I was either sleeping during lessons or swooning over Sakura-chan...", he said.

Sasuke scoffed before crossing his arms, "I can't believe that you still have a thing for that broad. But I guess that would justify you attacking me", he deduced with his irritation level rising at the mention of earlier events.

Naruto didn't even crack a smile, "Well... you got _one_ right...", he said.

-

Ten minutes later, back at the stone path of Academy grounds...

Sakura's spirit was barely recovering from a harsh blow after the altercation with Sasuke, _"'Your annoying', huh...? That... really hurts... for something so simple. I... I guess this is how Naruto must've felt. I... probably haven't been the most likable person when I'm around him... From now on, I should try to be a little nicer...", _she thought with shame toward how rotten she may have been to her blonde teammate.

As if on cue, the pink haired female heard two familiar voices speaking. And that's exactly what got her attention; the boys who owned these voices could never connect the way these ones were. She had started to think that she was just hearing things until she saw it for herself. There they were; a boy in orange with his hands behind his head and a boy in blue with his hands in his pocket interacting perfectly with one another..

"Seriously though; you should give her a try. She really likes you", Naruto said with his usual energetic persona.

Sasuke scoffed a little, "No thanks... The only thing I wanna do is take care of business. Having _either_ of you along would just slow me down, bakano...", he said with a smile that he couldn't seem to vanquish.

Naruto grinned widely, "Yeah right! You know you love us!", he declared.

Sasuke looked away; once again failing to rid himself of the smile on his face, "Little fool...", he murmered under his breath.

"Besides, they put all of us on teams... that has to mean somethin'-I mean, don't you think it's a little odd that they'd do that?", the blonde boy asked.

Sasuke harbored a look of silent curiousity at these words, "You know... that would have to be the first lick of sense that you've ever made since... well... let's just say that its the first lick of sense that you've ever made...", he crudely retorted.

"Oh, screw you...", Naruto said with a laugh.

_"What on Earth? Since when did those two become... well... friend-like_", Sakura questioned before she heard her name

"My point is that maybe you should try being a little nicer to Sakura-chan; for the sake of the team if anything else", Naruto suggested.

The black eyed Uchiha glanced at his friend, "Hm... The day I do that, is the day that you'd actually be right about something. So I can definately give it a try... IF you're right about the team thing", he challenged.

"Alright! You're on Uchibus!", Naruto happily obliged; gaining a sudden glare from Sasuke.

Without actually realizing how far they have walked, the two boys peered ahead and saw the confused and genuinely amazed Sakura staring right at them. Needless to say, she was rather speechless at this RARE(!) occasion. But despite the confusion, she found herself chuckling at her teammate's sudden chemistry. She found it rather... cute. Not only that, but unless she was drugged she could have sworn that she just heard Naruto say that Sasuke should be nicer to her. That would be a fist in anyone's book. Unfortunately for _Sakura_, that only made her feel a little worse about herself. And if she didn't know any better, she'd have to say that Naruto was practically giving her to Sasuke without a second thought; meaning his crush on her was dead and gone. That... only added to her shame as she began to think that the blonde somehow got wind of what she said about him.

Sakura gulped hard at that thought; feeling her guilt creep upon her evermore, _"God, I'm such a bitch. I should've never said those things about him_...", she thought.

Snapping her back to reality was the voice of Naruto, "You okay, Sakura-chan?", he thoughtfully asked despite the lingering pain that resided in his heart.

Surprisingly, the jade eyed kunoichi found it damn-near excruciating to give the boy eye-contact. She would mostly look at the ground and contimplate how she could put any appology into words... no such luck.

"O-Oh... Yeah, I'm good", she said in a MOST unconvinving way.

Both Sasuke and Naruto shot a quick similtaneous glance to each other before shrugging any confusion off, "Well then, let's just get back to class", the Uchiha suggested.

That being said, both boys of the team made their way back to the Academy building; walking right passed Sakura, who was still lost in thought. After a short walking distance, Naruto stopped and turned around; letting Sasuke walk ahead.

"You commin' Sakura-chan?", he called out.

The girl in question whirled around only to see that her teammates were ahead of her. Quickly shaking her doubted thoughts, Sakura hurried her ass over to Naruto. They both caught up to Sasuke and made it back to class together... As a team.

------

Fourty-five minutes later...

NaruxSakuxSasu (... no...) were waiting impatiently for a very important... meeting. For Naruto it felt like a freakin' eternity; so much so, that he stromed to the door, poked his head out and frantically scanned the halls to see any sign of Team 7's so-called sensei. After a full minute of searching, Naruto finally gave up, leaned his back against the wall and huffed with exsasperation. Sakura, who leaned upon one of the wooden desks, finally reacted to the boredom that swooshed over her.

"This is so stupid... Where the Hell is _our_ sensei?", she questioned.

"Seriously... Why is it that out of all of the teams that were here, we are the ones who are last to be picked. Is our sensei asleep or something?!", Naruto questioned as well.

Sasuke, who was simply sitting at the front desk with his hands laced together, sighed, "Just wait... Probably wankin' off or something", he crudely suggested.

Before Sakura could even think to react to that comment, she noticed Naruto standing on a chair and balancing a dusty eraser at the top of the slidding door.

"Naruto, what are you doing?", the pink haired Genin asked.

The blonde boy grinned, "I'm gonna teach him a thing or two about keeping us waiting for 20 years just for a lousy meeting", he declared.

"You're kidding... What's the point in that?"

**_"CHA!!! Fantastic idea! Show that slacker a mop-top full of chalk dust!", _**Inner Sakura barked.

Sasuke leaned back in his seat, lounged his arms back and looked at Naruto with question, "And exactly what part of pulling such a stupid and obvious prank that a Jounin would so easily avoid, make that a good idea, ya dunder-head?", he said.

Sakura sighed, "Honestly... You should just take that down and wait like the rest of us-", she said.

Of course, at the very MOMENT she finishd her sentence, a fingerless gloved hand reached through the opening of the door; gaining sudden looks of anticipation from the young Team. At the instant that the man slid the door open the eraser fell from the widened crease. Unfortunately for the poor soul, the eraser's contact with his head somehow sent him CRASHING through the wooden floor before he burst through the wall on his right side; colliding face-first into the ground next to the hole his body had created. Everyone else in that room shared identical looks of sheer flabbergast and and confusion; completely and totally speecless as to what the Hell just happened.

Naruto_: Why has my life suddenly turned into a whirlpool of Awk-weirdness...? ... ... ... _

Sakura_: Umm... ... ... Why??????_

Sasuke_: Jounin... plus Eraser... plus falling through the floor and then... IT JUST DOESN'T ADD UP!!!!_

------

A thousand appologies, an ounce of morphine and an ice-pack later...

Team 7 and their passive-agressively irritated sensei, Kakashi Hatake sat at a nice little relaxing portion of the Academy with the Team sitting on the floor and their sensei sitting across from them atop a rail... with a gaint ice-pack on his aching head.

"Okay you idiots... Now the first thing I recommend we do, is a formal introduction... Telling me about yourselves; things you like... things you hate and... dreams for the future, starting with-mmmmmmm-you", he said before pointing at Naruto.

Excitedly, the boy in question straightened his head band and began, "Hai! Hai! My name is Naruto Uzumaki. A real go-getter of sorts. I like steaming hot Ramen in a cup; chicken and miso pork usually. I can't stand the three minutes it takes for the Ramen to cook... and, umm... Oh, yeah! My dream is to be-**_THE EMBODIMENT OF ALL THAT IS CHAOS!!! WHERE EVER I GO, I SHALL STRING A SLAUGHTH OF DISORD AND MAYHEN!!! WHEN MY NAME IS HEARD, THE HEAVANS WILL TREMBLE IN THE VIBRANT ROAR OF CHAOS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", _**he involuntarily roared with a strange echoing voice before falling silent with a shocked and amazed look on his face; gaining equal looks from everyone else.

"... Um... I-mean... ... To be the most chaotic Hokage-NO-the greatest HoKAOS-... ... ... ... .. ... Hokage... ... Yeah... ... All ya need to know..."

After a long period of uncomfortable silence, Kakashi cleared his throat, "Very good then... Next... what about you", he said pointing to Sakura who seemed to be a little... distracted.

_"Hmm... Maybe... Maybe I can invite him for lunch or something; talk to him about it their. I really think that he actually knows what I said about him. I can tell, but... he's being really humble about it... I didn't know he could be generous in such a way that he wouldn't totally freak out on me for going super-bitch on him. He's... nice. A bit weird and com-PLETELY random but... nice",_ she trailed off in her thoughts

Kakashi adjusted his ice-pack and tried to get Sakura's attention again, "Umm... is there anything that you would happen to like... anything at all?", he asked.

In a HORRIBLE event of bad timing, Sakura's mind oozed out of her mouth as she murmered 'Naruto' as a unintentional response to her new sensei's question.

Naruto and Sasuke: WHAT?!

Snapped out of her thoughts again, Sakura quickly and impulsively corrected herself.

"DANGO!!!!!!! I-I... like Dango!", she stammered.

Kakashi blinked twice, "Oh... thats what I thought you said"

Naruto: Yeah me too...

Sasuke: Diddo...

Several loose sweat-beads escaped the long haired Genin's face as she was EXTREMELY relieved that she saved herself.

"Sooo, whats your name?", Kakashi continued.

"Oh. My name is Sakura Haruno. And uh... as you know... I like Dango", she said awkwardly.

"Okay... things you hate..."

Sakura's face scrunch up as the face one particular person came to mind, "... INO!!!", she snarked.

As if in immediate response to those words, the sound of a branch snapping could be heard from behind the Team. They looked behind them only to see Ino free-fall off of a nearby tree and crash upon another branch... with the soft space between her legs to cution her fall. Letting out a lamenting screech of anguish, the bleach blonde kunoichi slid off of the branch and crashed to the ground before lifting herself up and limping away as fast as she could; holding her bruised area as she did just that.

The uncanny and completely random events of that had been taking place had only added to the intensity of Kakashi's migrane. The silver haired Jounin adjusted his ice pack again and continued.

"Moving right along... What about you...?", he said pointing to Sasuke.

"My name... is Sasuke Uchibus-... ... Uchiha", he corrected himself before shooting an 'I'm going to get you' glare at Naruto, who tried his damndest to hold in his laughter.

Refocusing, Sasuke continued, "I hate a lot of things... and I can't say that I really like _anything_. My dream... is to revive my clan and to kill a certain someone... slowly", he said in a low tremor.

Naruto: "Kkkkukukukuku_..." He said Uchibus... _

Sakura: _God he's so intense..._

Kakashi: _I wonder whats on TV tonight... NO! Thinking bad for Kakashi now; he must get this over with and make head all better..._

"Okay... Now that we got that out of they way-"

"Hold it!", Naruto interjected, "What about _you_?"

"Yeah Sensei", Sakura added, "How can you call it a proper introduction if _you_ haven't introduced yourself yet?"

The masked Jounin blinked before refocusing, "Hmm. Very well; my name is Kakashi Hatake... Things I like... Well, I like a lot of things... Things I hate... mmm-well aside from this soul-searing migrane that I've aquired from _someone_ I could mention, I really don't feel telling you any of that...", he said.

NAruto crossed his arms and looked away, "I said I was sorry...", he murmered.

"My dreams for the future... Hmmmm... can't say I have one of those. Well then, after that stimulating intro, I think we're ready to move on", Kakashi said with an indifferent smile behind his mask.

_"Well that was completely usless. All he really told us was his name...", _Sakura thought with a comical sneer.

From there, Team 7's sensei explained in detail; the terms of work they'd be up to. One of which was a survival test that would further determine whether or not they were fit to become Genin the upcomming day... A test that NO ONE has been able to pass. After the explaination and the individual thoughts and feelings from each of the Genin, Kakashi dismissed his new squad. However, before his students left, the lax Jounin mention one last detail of great importance.

"Oh... and I suggest you skip breakfast or you'll puke-"

------

Meanwhile at the Konaha Hospital...

A Med Nin had a patient in... a very special patient. At first, he simply didn't believe what he was hearing and deduced it to be some sort of joke as a means to make his job a living Hell.

"Okay Mister Nara; you say that you came in here under the pretenses of... your hair... acting on it's own...?", he asked with and obvious display of disbelieve.

Shikamaru sighed. This would have to be the third time he's explained himself, "For the love of pie, yes! For the last time, no matter what I do or how many hair-bands I tie it into, I ALWAYS looks like _this_!", he declared a bit more forcefully.

Shikamaru's hair (as opposed to his earlier Afro) was in a pertetual state of droop. Whether he tried to frizz it out or jel it, his hair always drooped down. He would try to tie it into a hair-band back into the pony-tail everyone recognized him in, but then it would just burst out and droop again!

"Uh, Mister Nara. I think that this... problem you're having is best left to a cosmetologist, not a Medic like m-good lord! Where did you get that hidious scar on your finger?"

Shikamaru looked down at the troublesome scar from earlier today and sighed as he was reminded of yet another thing that bothered him today.

"You know, I don't get what's up with this thing. When I leave it alone, its just fine but when I try to wrap it-... well let me show", he said as he pulled out a spare bandage and wrapped his finger.

Upon doing this, the black haired Genin's finger stared to bleed uncontrolably. So much, in fact, that it started to drip through the bandage; much to the Medic's surprise.

"See..."

"My Goodness! Now THAT needs my attention! Although I must admit... it is quite unique... May I see that bandage for a moment", the Med asked.

Complying without a fuss, Shikamaru handed the bloody bandage to the Med, where as he brushed it against a thin rectangular glass (honestly I can't remember what those things are called) and brought it to a microscope to examine it. Upon doing so, the Medic carefully adjusted the scope-lens to see what he was looking at only to get a similar onomoly that he had witnessed only a day previously and needless to say...

it was just as astounishing...

Upon the microscope he saw familiar looking cells in the form of Naruto's head playing chess (yes, without arms).

"What the-"

"What? What is it?"

The Med turned to face his patient, "Mister Nara... Have you had any sort of previous contact with-(quickly turns around to double-check his microscope)-Naruto Uzumaki as of late?". he asked.

The young shadow weilder sighed, "Wow. What tipped you off. Oh, could it have been the huge gash on my finger?", he asked sarcastically.

The Med gained an incredulous look, "Wait... Surely you're not gonna tell me that he... bit you..."

"Thats exactly what he did..."

"... ... wwwhy??"

"Well... I ... kinda... ya know... wavedmyhandtohisface-but-"

Oh, well no wonder! Okay look, given the circumstances I may need some help. Just lie down and I'll be right with you", the Med said before he left the room to get some 'help'

After about ten minutes, the same Med returned to the room with three others at his side, "Okay Mister Nara. We're going to do one major test to figure out what the deal is okay?"

Shikamaru sighed again, "Its just troublesome. Just get it over with..."

"Very well then... Strap him in before he gets up..."

"Do what now?"

CCRRRINNCH

"WHAT THE-!"

* * *

**_Boom Boom BABY!!! Chapter five of the Chaos has been Completed!!!! Listen, for those of you who like the events in the Realm of the Gods, sorry for the lack of that but be greatful; there will be a little bonus for those of you who enjoy that! So after a nice little typing frenzy... CRAINE HAS LEFT THE BUILDING!!!!!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	6. The Bonds of Friendship and Chaos

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_Yesss... Soon the Chaos shall truly erupt! And all of you can have a story on fan fiction that you can share with your grand kids (if you want to lock 'em in theropy for a couple o' years). Now then, the story shall run along as plan and will have that insaciable CHAOS to brighten everyone's day... or just fuck it up... NOW_**

**_CHAOS REIN DOWN!!!!!!_**

**_

* * *

_**

Chapter 6: The Bonds of Friendship and Chaos

* * *

**_IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

Fukyouwaon was starting to grow a little bored with the lack of desired Chaos down in the Mortal World. So the dark God took a deep breath, swallowed his pride... and entered the Temple of the Gods behind him.

-

Within the Temple...

Several of the Gods from MANY different religions had made their appearance in trio's as they were rearin' to go... in the Poker Tournament. As Fate would have it, Zeus, Ganesh and Jesus started their matches again when the Holy Spirit finally decided to stop cheating and play like a God. In a different corner of the holy santcuary was another trio... and a very weird one at that. These Gods are the ones that stood out the most and it stood to reason when you had the Dragon God Bahamut sitting at the table with his massiveness, acompanied by Shinigami (God of Death) and Hermes (Messanger of the Gods)

"I have absolutely no i-DEA what you guys _see_ in this game! WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!?!", Bahamut roared as he pointed furiously at the cards binched within his massive claws.

Shinigami scoffed, "Well for one thing, you're not supposed to show us your cards...", he said.

Bahamut slowly flipped his cards to the RIGHT side and put a claw to his snout, "... I'm not...?", he question.

"Good Gods, Bahamut! Why did you even come here?", Hermes said.

The Black Dragon Deity snorted, "_Don't_ give me any shit! You're the ones who talked me into it", he mentioned.

"Oh bullshit. We weren't the ones who claimed to be the Prime Omnipotence of every game created, so don't blow that crap", Shinigami retorted.

"Whatever you little fucks...", Bahamut conceded.

In another corner of the Temple were a more... fitting trio consisting of Anubus, Fenrir and Amaturasu (The Canine Gods); sitting in their own little group watching the bordem of the Tounament.

Amaturasu sighed, "This is so very monotonous... I mean, look at them all. Since when did the Gods become so fixated on anything else but their actual jobs...?", she said.

"Tell me about it...", Fenrir concurred, "It's like the Realm of the Gods has gone to Hell in a Ham basket and back... Sure they said they were gonna take a break but this is just ludicrous..."

Anubus huffed, "For the love of Jesus-"

Jesus: What?

"DON'T START THAT AGAIN!! Damn I hate when he does that... Anyway, you two have nothing to complain about. I mean it's not like either of you were forced to come here", the Egyptian God of Death said.

Amaturasu lifted her head up at Anubus, "You know what, Anubus; I think I just about had it with you're annoying 'I'm better than you because I can stand on two legs' attitude. Why can't you just take you human complex and jump off a cliff; ya know, do us all a favor", she snarked.

"Are you still mad that I get to sit on the chairs and you don't because you're a degenerate version of a higher being such as myself...", Anubus arrogantly responded.

The Sun Goddess bared her teeth and growled, "Yeah... Keep talkin' like that and if I don't snap your body alimement with ours..."

"Bitch-threaten me again and see what happens!"

"RRRRR-BITCH?!"

Fenin lifted his paw over his nuzzle and sighed, "Not here, you two... Not here... You remember what happened last time...", he said; camling the heated Canines down for a time...

_"I swear... We Gods are getting too old for this shit_", the Wind God thought dryly to himself.

Just then, the giant doors to the Temple slammed open; revealing the baggy eyed God of Chaos, Fukyouwaon, "Okay you dunder-heads; I give up... I'll play the stupid-"

SWIPE!!!!

Fukyouwaon was suddenly taken by the arms by Raijin and Fuujin, who dragged him to an empty table.

Raijin: Glad to see that-

Fuujin: -you changed your mind...

With that, Fukyouwaon was dropped on a chair and given a few cards, "We already shuffled and dealt them of course", Fuujin said as he picked up his cards.

The black robed Deity cranked his blood-shot eyes down, slowly picked up his cards and sighed, "I didn't change my mind... I'm merely waiting for something interesting to happen to Naruto...", he tiredly explained.

"Do you truly believe that the little brat has what it takes to become a Chaos Knight; let alone surpass the first?", Raijin questioned.

"Well, he has shown considerable growth via his random out bursts and actions beyond his control. And he has also revealed that he can already branch the Essence of Chaos to others. Not even the First developed as fast as young Naruto...", Fukyouwaon said as he looked blankly at his cards.

"Hn... With the way you're talking it sounds like his full potential will be awakened in a matter of days...", Raijin commented.

"Are you on Crack, Raijin? The prosses, no matter who you are, takes quite some time and you know this. Naruto indeed has the gift, but it does sadden me to see how much of a difference in power and maturity there is in him and the First Chaos Knight... but he'll come around", the dark God smiled.

Just then, another door within the temple slammed open; gaining everyone's attention. But when Zeus saw the person who entered, he frowned deeply before turning back to his match.

The gruff and tough looking savage of a God approached the table where Fukyouwaon and the others were sitting, pulled up a seat and lounged into it.

"Hey Kratos...", the three greeted in unison.

"'Sup...", the armored and newly dubbed God of War responded.

Fukyouwaon's eyebrow raised, "Wait a second-did you take your pills?", he questioned.

"After what happened last time... I think I learned my lesson. Now... ... ...

Lets do Poker"

------

Back in the Mortal Realm...

It was VERY early in the morning as Team 7 reluctantly arrived at the training grounds as instructed by their sensei. Sakura was stumbling forward because of mal nutrition, Sasuke was walking tall trying to act like nothing was wrong and Naruto... well... actually he was marching along as if everything was fine; carrying a sack with over his shoulder.

Sakura: ... Uuuugh... Good Morning...

Sasuke: ...

Naruto: Whats crackin' lil' bitches!

The blonde's teammates looked over at him... then looked back in their own directions.

"Whats got you in such an awesome mood?", Sakura questioned as Sasuke remained silent.

Naruto was suddenly beaming, "Hehe... I ate a huge breakfast before I came here", he said with glee0filled content.

"Oh... thats ni-... ... YOU WHAT?!?!", the pink haired kunoichi shouted.

"Thats right! Can't pass a survival test on an empty stomach, ya know!", he joyously declared.

Sasuke crossed his arm, "You are so busted Naruto. Kakashi-sensei is so gonna see right through you...", he said.

"Why did you eat when you know we weren't supposed to?", Sakura asked; temporarily forgetting her hunger.

"Oh please! Like I was really gonna starve before a test that would determine whether or not I remain a Genin; I'M NOT GOING BACK TO THE ACADEMY! The day I do that is the day I crash to my knees and kiss The Hokage's ass!", Naruto announced.

Hearing this, Sasuke couldn't help but smile, "Hmph. Care to make a bet on that one too?"

"Shut your beak Uchibus...", the blonde Genin said gaining another look of irritation from the black haired Uchiha.

Sakura was starting to grow a little irritated herself, "Okay LOOK! Sasuke-kun as a point... If Kakashi-sensei finds out that you ate then you may as well pucker up... Besides... I'm hungry too!", she bellowed.

Naruto perked his head up, "Oh, thats why I brought these...", he said as he opened his carried sack and pulled out six rice-balls causing his teammate's eyes to practically buldge from their heads.

Offering the food graciously (three per-teammate), Naruto smiled widely, "Well, what are you waiting for? Eat up!", he enthuised.

Seeing the very embodiment of heaven right in front of her in Naruto's hands, Sakura's eyes began to tears for multiple reasons; she skipped both breakfast AND dinner last night and the aroma of the freshly cooked rice-balls along with the thought of how glorious they would taste assault her. Feeling as though she may have been dreaming, the pink haired female slowly reached her and out to grab the food; occasionally flinching back as though expecting them to vanish from exsistence, but when she was able grasp them and savor the mere feel of it, she unconsciously began to lightly snivel.

She cradled the mass of Godliness within her arms before setting two of them down and slowly lifting one of them to her mouth. She sank her teeth into the softness of Heavan... and could no longer hold her tears back as a wave of unchallenge euphoria washed over her. Barely taking the time to chew her first bite, Sakura quickly dug into her meal again making indistintive sounds that indicated that she was genuinely happy.

_"Screw my diet... I'm starving...", _she thought.

Satisfied with his teammate's reaction, Naruto smiled widely before turning to Sasuke, who had his head turned away as a means of rejecting the food and of coneiling a nervous yet greatful blush.

"Whats with you, Sasuke. I know you're hungry...", the blonde Kitsune knowingly accused.

The blue-clad Uchiha turned even more to the point where his back was facing Naruto completely.

"I'd rather starve..."

"OH? I believe thats where our opinions differ...", Naruto proclaimed before he brought one of the rice-balls to his face and began to inhale it's glorious scent in a VERY taunting way, "Mmmmmm... Yeah-this smell delicious..."

Sasuke solidified his tough-guy routine; trying ever so hard not to listen to the taunting noises of Naruto.

"He-hey. I forgot that I put soy sauce on these ones... So rich in flavor and just a hint of spice. Mm! To die for...", Naruto continued.

Without his consent, Sasuke's mouth began to water while he unconsciously licked his lips as his mind was suddenly plagued with the tantelizing images of what the rice-balls would taste like. Cursing himeself for such weakness, Sasuke frowned deeply as he attempted to trail his focus to the sky and watch the clouds to tune out the incessant taunting of his blonde teammate. UNFORTUNATELY, Naruto's voice echoed throughout his head; the irking voice that tempted him to take the food when his sensei wished against. As his head echoed and his saliva thickened, the hungry Uchiha suddenly saw the clouds take the shape of a (you fucking guessed it) rice-ball...

"Good God, no...", he said out loud, much to Naruto's delight.

"Well... if you insist...", he said before taking a huge bite out of the rice-ball in his hand.

Vividly hearing the sound of teeth sinking into soft delectable goodness, Sasuke finally snapped; he whirled around, took all of the rice-balls, ran off to a distant tree and ravenously scarfed them down as if it was the last meal he'd ever have; occasionally glaring back at his rest of his as though he were savagely protecting his food. Naruto smiled even more as he felt pretty content with himself; a clear conscience on his side.

"Heh... I knew he'd come around...", he said to himself before letting his body fall to the ground and rest with his hands behind his back.

As a short period of time rolled by, Naruto's eyelids began to get heavy. With the cloud lulling him to sleep, a sudden darkness loomed over him; waking him up almost instantly. Looking up at the shape, he recognized it right away, but before he had the chance to speak...

"Th... Thank you... Naruto", the sweet voice of the greatful Sakura sounded out.

Naruto closed his eyes again, "Hmhmhm. Don't mention it. You guys are like family to me now that we're a team_..."-"Aside from the fact that you're a total bitch... but I can live with you_..."

Smiling warmly at the resting Naruto, Sakura felt a wierd sensation build up in her heart. It was as though her arms and legs went numb without loosing any feeling and her chest ached in the best possible way. She sat back on her knees and held her hand to her heart as she suddenly felt her face get warm and fuzzy.

_"Wow I feel different... thats the last time I skip breakfast, I tell you", _she thought to no one but herself not knowing that she was blushing.

After a short time, Sasuke approached the rest of his team and stared down at the relaxed Naruto. to be completely honest... he didn't know what to say; he was just silent as he tried to search for the right words. A part of Sasuke was actually shameful about what he had previously thought about his blonde teammate. Sure he was annoying, loud, overconfident and a bit too out-going at times but only a true friend would take his well-being into consideration no matter how much of a dick he may have been to the guy. So he put the only words that he may never be able to say into thought form.

_"... Thanks..."_

As if in complete resonse to these thoughts, a sudden smile crept upon Naruto's face...

"No problem, Uchibus...", he murmered causing Sasuke to not only frown with irritation over that STUPID nick-name, but try to figure out why he responded...

_"Eh... Must've been dreaming..."_

And so began the long and overly drug out wait for Kakashi began. Nut instead of what would natually be a tedious wait, was actually a valuable experience between the three Genin. As the hours passed and the sky became bright and vivid, Team 7 was able to establish some useful communication between each other; given the fact that Sasuke was the one who spoke the least, he was at least able to open up about a few things that he would otherwise not be ready for. Sakura was the one who spoke the most about herself; she was definately eager to take this golden opportunity to tell sasuke about herself. the strange thing was that she was equally willing to share with Naruto as well.

Questionable, yes... but stimulating in a way...

The hours continued to pass and STILL no Kakashi, but seeen as how these teammates; quickly becoming friends, were communicating so smoothly, it wasn't that bad. They actually found that they all had things in common; something that was unexpected to say the least. Switching from various positions, be it laying on their backs; staring at the clouds or lounging against a tree, these three Genin didn't seem to feel the monotony of time in the least. As far as they were concerned, their sensei was sleeping or... wankin' off (as Sasuke previously put it).

As the sun was now hovered above the trio; signifying the beginning of Noon, the team found themselves sleeping peacfully against a tree, with Sakura unconsciously craddling the heads of both of her teammates in her arms. What they all failed to notice, was a nostagically smiling Kakashi standing over them; watching.

_"Hm... Well what do ya know... ... ... Well, time to get up"_

With that, the masked Jounin suddenly appeared atop the tree that his new squad was sleeping under and sliced a branch off causing it to free-fall in direct course of the Team. Immediately sensing danger, Sasuke's eyes shot open.

"HAAAAAAAAAH", he yelled before dashing away from the danger-zone; taking Naruto and Sakura with him.

Seeing this failure, Kakashi snapped his fingers in dissapointment, "Damn... I was hoping for pay back for my migrane Yesterday...", he said to himself.

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

The large doors to the Temple was busted down by a raging Kratos.

"This game CHEATS! The GODS are WORTHLESS!!!", he bellowed as he stormed off into the distance.

Within the great Temple Fukyouwaon, Raijin, and Fuujin all sighed in exasperation.

"Dammit... I knew he forgot... He ALWAYS forgets to take his PILLS!", the God of Chaos huffed.

At the Table of Zeus, Ganesh and Jesus, the Great Elephant God crossed his four arms and scoffed.

"What de Hell is wrong with that one?", he asked.

Jesus pinched the bridge of his nose, "Kratos hates everyone here for some reason; somethin' to do with Gods not fufilling their promises or somethin' of that nature... Probably has soemthing do with him killing a God... Ares is what is name was...", he said.

Ganesh scoffed again, "Please... You're saying that he is a raging ass-jock becaue he killed Ares? So what if he killed a God...? I could kill a God... I could kill you right now", he threatened as he pulled out a shamsher with his trunk and pointed it in Jesus' direction, who pulled out a sword of his own.

"...You can't kill a man twice, bitch..."

Zeus: Okay you two. I don't know how many times we have to go through this before you realize that we can't die by each others hands but it will definately but some life into this otherwise bullshit day...

* * *

**_Okay... I hope that you guys are still with me. I have been contemplating how I can make Team 7's relationship a little more smooth. Sorry if this story lacked any of the randomness that dreams are made of, but that will be served on the next chapter. Also, I bet you guys are wondering how a dunder-head like Naruto actually made the desicion to eat... Well, like I said... Next chapter..._**

**_Peace._**


	7. A Team's Recollection

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_Ask NOT for whom the bell tolls! For it TOLLS... in the NAME of CHAOS!!!! In case you weren't able to tell, the Bell Test is about to get under way. I hope that I can spruce things up with enough Chaos to keep you guys glued to the screen cause THATS what I'm aimin' for. Hang on to yer hats people!_**

**_Discord shall rule!!!_****_

* * *

_**

Chapter 7: A Team's Recollection

* * *

After narrowly rescuing himself and his now startled team from being crushed by a severed tree branch (curtousy of your friendly neighborhood Copy Nin), a wide eyed and hyperventilating Sasuke glared at his teacher. 

"Where the Hell have you been?", he asked in a somewhat subdued manner despite his massive startlement, "It doesn't take you four hours to wake you ass up and meet us here..."

Kakashi maintained his laid back disposition, "Sorry... As I made my way here, I got lost on the magnifincent road of that which is-"

"LIES!!!!!!!", Naruto and Sakura bellowed in unison.

The masked Nin ran one of his hands through his silver hair and sighed, "Well actually I was going to say Life, but... ... no. If you're all ready to go, lets begin right away", he said before jumping off of the tree that he stood on.

As a response, the Team stood side by side; awaiting further instructions, "Sooo whats this so called Survival Test all about, Sensei? I still think its BS that we're sent back to the Academy if we fail...", Naruto asked curiously.

Kakashi smiled behind his mask, "Well, since you're so eager to get started...", he began before reaching in his pocket and pulling out two bells; jingling them together.

"Right. Bells, how enchanting. So about this test...", Naruto pressed on.

"This _is_ your test... The objective is to take these bells from me before a certain time limit", Kakashi said.

Sakura frowned, "Thats it? What kind of _test_ is that?", she questioned with doubt.

"I wouldn't be so lax about it Sakura... When I say 'take' the bells, I do mean by force", the silver haired Nin explained, "Meaning, I will flatten your sorry asses if you think you can just walk up to me and ask politely, is that understood?"

Naruto and Sakura gulped as a response and Sasuke merely scoffed.

"The rules are simple; you must be ready and willing to take these bells by any means necassary... that includes the intent on taking my life... Who so ever possesses one of these bells can proudly call themselves a Ninja", Kakashi said.

"What?! B-But Sensei, thats suicide! You're a Jounin. What are Genin like us supposed to do to get those bells?", Sakura questioned.

The masked Copy Nin smiled through his mask before walking up an area with three target stumps aligned beside each other, "Why, I already told you what you needed to do", he said before setting an alarm clock that was stationed atop the center stump.

The Team glanced at the clock; 12:00pm...

"One hour... you will all have one hour to complete this test. If you fail to retrieve to bells by the time the alarm goes off, then not only will you have to suffer through the agonizing torture of watching me eat my lunch in front of you, but... well... you should all know better than anyone what would happen", Kakashi said with a slight glimmer in his eye.

As the three Genin collected themselves, Sakura noticed something completely wrong, "Hey wait a second... There's only two", she said.

The silver haired Jounin looked back at his new squad and then looked at the bells in his hand, "Why, yes... So there is", he said in mock surprise.

"But thats stupid!", Naruto interjected, "That means that no matter what we do, at least ONE of us is going back to the Academy! What the Hell is that?!"

"How very observant of you Naruto. But if I were you, I'd be trying to figure out the means of taking these bells...", the one eyed man mocked causing Naruto to frown deeply.

Hearing the terms of agreement for this test, Sakura was now at a loss, _"This isn't fair... If... If by some miracle we manage to pass this stupid test, then one of us is gone, either way... But if we fail, then that means that I'd be seperated from Sasuke-kun AND Naruto. I... I don't want that. Especially after seeing how sweet Naruto can be. I... didn't get a chance to set things straight with him. I can't be seperated from them just when we all got to know each other a lot better... I have to do this... for them!",_ she inwardly declared.

Of course, Naruto's situation was no different, _"DAMN!! What a jip! But I guess I should be greatful for getting a chance like this anyway. Not only that, but I can test my little teamwork theory as well. Problem is, win or lose, someone will lose... ... ... Well... I can't say that I did incredibly too hot this year._

(Sasuke shifts an incredulous stare at Naruto)

_If we pass, then... Sasuke and Sakura-chan can have the bells. I think that... they deserve it more...", _Naruto thought.

Sasuke's stare never faded, _"Naruto...",_ he thought.

"Hm? What is it Sasuke?", the orange clad blonde responded for some ODD reason.

The raven haired Uchiha averted his gaze to the ground trying to figure out what in the FUCKLES was goin' on!

"Um... I suggest you three get a move on. Times running out", Kakashi said..

In a simaltaneous fashion, Team 7 scattered off into three different sectors of the area; conieling there presence without fail and leaving Kakashi out in the open, where he awaited what they had in store.

"Basic rule of being a Shinobi; learning to manipulate hiding places of any sort...", he said to himself as he looked around a little, "Well... they got _that_ part down..."

Within one of the trees of the training grounds was a masterfully hidden Sasuke, who's focus was divided into to halves; one being how to get those bells without getting himself killed and... Naruto. It was stupid... it was REALLY stupid, but the black eyed Genin was willing to try it regardless.

_"... ... ... Naruto... ... Naruto can you hear me...", _Sasuke inwardly called out.

Within another tree around the area, Naruto could have sworn that he heard his name. Thing is... that would be crazy; he was fully aware that the rest of his team had found their own hiding places, so hearing Sasuke's voice would be positively absurd.

_"Eh... must've been hearing things..."_

_"Now you weren't you idiot. It's Sasuke..."_

Hearing his voice again, Naruto started to freak out a little bit as he whipped his head from left to right trying to find his other teammate.

"What the Hell?! Am I losing my mind or something?!", the blue eyed Genin said to himself, but quiet enough to keep his presence coneiled, "Sasuke? Where are you..."

No response...

Naruto was getting a little sceptical, _"... ... Sasuke... is that you?", _he inwardly called.

_Sasuke: Okay... so I'm not totally losing it..."_

_Naruto: What the fuck?! Where are you?_

_Sasuke: About twenty meters off of Kakashi-sensei's left side._

_Naruto: Oh... ... Then do you mind explaining to me how in the blue blazes of Hell I can hear you like we're right next to each other?!?!_

_Sasuke: I don't know how and I don't know why, but for SOME REASON(!) we can hear each other's thoughts..._

_Naruto: COOL!!!! But... ya know I... gotta make sure and all so... ... ... Sasuke Uchibus is a cock sucking whore-bag!_

_Sasuke: Wha-! FUCK YOU!!!!!!!!_

_Naruto: Gahahahahahaa! Gomen, Gomen! I was just testing it. Sooo what does this mean?_

_Sasuke: How should I know? Thing is, I don't care how this is happening because this couldn't be more perfect. Now we can communicate like this without giving away any info, or in your case, testing your little teamwork theory._

_Naruto: Ahh! Good ide-... How long were you able to here my thoughts..._

_Sasuke: ... ... ... I'm... not sure... I think it was... when... you gave me those riceballs-WHAT DID YOU FEED ME YOU DIP?!?!_

_Naruto: HEY! Don't pin this on me, Uchibus! I'm just as shocked a you are, so-... ... ..._

_Sasuke: What...?_

_Naruto: Sakura is a pathetic sniveling fan-girl who can't seem to take no for an answer... Oh and she's flat-chested too._

_Sasuke: You think so too, huh?_

_Naruto: Not so much, but I was just seeing if she could hear us as well... _

_Sasuke: Hn. So... how are we gonna do this. If you really wanna test your little theory, than we'll have to let Sakura in on anthing we do ya know._

_Naruto: I know... ... ... Hmmm... Lets see. We need to get those bells... There are two of them and three of us. In most accpects, we have the advantage but-_

_Sasuke: -but we're dealing with a Jounin. Who knows how far the depths of his skill go..._

Upon further speculation, all three Genin noticed their sensei reaching into his weapon pouch before pulling out a little red book titled 'Icha Icha Paradise' and began to read it.

"Guess I may as well continue where I left off...", Kakashi said to himself as he read the perverted novel with super interest.

Sakura, who was safely hidden benieth thick bushes, gained a look of ridicule, _"You're kidding... He's reading, even at the possiblity of him getting killed. Come on", _she thought.

After about ten minutes of spying later, Naruto's head perked up, "Ah-ha"-_"Sasuke"_

_Sasuke: You got a plan...?_

_Naruto: Kkkukukukkkkukuku... Yeah... Have you noticed how much he seems to adore that book?_

_Sasuke: Enough to know that the perverted giggling can draw some pretty negative attention to oneself an-..._

_Naruto: Hehehe... Are you thinking what I'm thinking..._

_Sasuke: ... I'll tell Sakura..._

**_MEANWHILE IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

Hours... It's been HOURS and Fukyouwaon was still playing Poker with Raijin and Fuujin. Normally, hours would seem like nothing to a God, especially a God that has existed since the beginning of everything. But for Fukyouwaon, it was longer than an eternity... so much longer.

_"I... I don't know how much longer I can take this... My eyes are gonna pop out of my head and run away if I don't think of something quick", _the dark God of Chaos thought frantically to himself as his blood-shot eyes stared at his seventh hand.

As if a higher being answered his plee, the doors to the Temple were once again kicked open by a giant armored foot and in came a storming Norris King of the Gods, Odin; carrying a trembling Thor by the back collar. The large God was a bearded, burly man with one eye, some pretty SICK ass fucking armor and a huge flowing cape.

**"Now APPOLOGIZE for BREAKING THEIR TABLE!!!", **Odin bellowed at the trembling Thor.

**"S-Sorry... I broke your table...", **Thor pathetically sniveled.

**"Of all the STUPID things in the Realm to deal with, WHY THIS?! You stupid little child!!! Why do I EVEN DEAL with you?!"**

**"Aw, come on, give me a break... I am Thor... God of Thunder.. and (sniff) your son..."**

**"OH PLEASE!!!!!! A REAL God of Thunder would have shown a little more self control before he decided to BREAK something that DIDN'T BELONG TO HIM! And your stupid little toy hammer, your girlish blonde hair and your frilly little MAN-SKIRT?! I HAVE NO SON!!!!!!!!!!!" **Odin howled before throwing the shamed Thor out of the Temple

Fukyouwaon perked up a bit. One of the few remaining Gods that harbored his respect had made his appearance.

"Finally. Someone to talk to instead of playing this stupid, ridiculous-"

**"Greeting Fellow Gods. Tell me more about this... 'Poker'. Seems to be all the rage throughout Valhalla..."**

Fukyouwaon's mouth was left hanging open with pure shock and utter shame, _"Not you too, Odin... Not you too!", _he inwardly cursed before simpley bursting from his chair and leaving the Temple so he could take a minute... scratch that... So he'd never walk in that Temple ever again...

Making his way to the Pool of Visions, Fukyouwaon gandered upon what was happening... and to even his surprise it was mildly entertaining.

"Ohhohohoho! Whats this? Did I happen to miss some very entertaining shit while I was waisting away?"

------

Back at the Mortal World...

A beaten and and slightly bloodied Sakura was running for all she was worth as she was being chased down by a savagely murderous Kakashi; hopping threw trees and zipping threw the place trying to get to her. For Sakura, this would have to be the first time that she had ever pushed her speed to this height; she was really bustin' it trying to get away from her sensei. Unfortunately, it would be a long time before the pink haired kunoichi would be able to out run Kakashi, seen as how he was mere inches behind her.

After a few more seconds into the chase, The crazed Copy Nin finally caught her and slammed her against a tree; holding her by her neck.

**"YYYYYOOOUUUUU**!!!!!!!!! How... DARE YOU?!?!?", Kakashi roared, "You have until the count of three, to correct the WRONG that you did, before I squash you like a grape!! UnderstaaaaAAAAAND?!?!?!?"

Sakura was silent as she gasped for air, but Kakashi loosened his grip so she could talk, "I'm not tellin' you sqaut!", she retorted defiantly.

"Then FEEL MY WRATH!!!", the masked Jounin declared before reeling his fist back.

Sakura shut her eyes tightly; expecting the impending blow, when all of the sudden a large rock came zipping in direct collision with the side of Kakashi's face. With amazing reflexes, the crazed Copy Nin dropped his victim and caught the big rock at the VERY last second; similtaneously crushing it in to powder, where as Sakura was able to scurry away to saftey. With Kakashi's focus redirected to the one who through the rock, he was determined now, more than ever, to make them all pay.

"Naruto! This time you've gone TOO FAR!!", the silver haired man bellowed, "GIVE ME BACK MY BOOK!!!"

The now worn and torn Naruto smiled deviously at his enraged sensei, "HA! You're gonna have to catch me first, Sensei!", he retorted.

Gaining a growl from Kakashi, Naruto was suddenly faced with SEVERAL clones of his teacher, "Last chance! Where's my BOOK?!", he demanded.

_"You mean this book_?", the confident voice of an equally battered Sasuke rang out from with a tree.

Kakashi whipped his head up and saw it... He saw his prescious book of glorious perversity resting within the young Uchiha's grasp.

"This is a very fasinating book. It'd be shame if... something unfortunate were to... happen to it...", he said mischeviously.

The Copy Nin's eye twitched wildly, "SASUKEEEEE!!!!!", he roared before the Uchiha vanished out of exsistence.

With a sudden jolt of realization shocking his system, Kakashi shot his sight back down to Naruto, who had also vanished.

"Damned Clones!"

Zipping out of the forest with his unpresedented speed, the masked man reastablished his maddening search for his most priced possession.

"I swear, when I find those kids I'll-... (GASP)"

When Kakashi saw Naruto and Sakura standing out in the open, conversing about what they would do with the book of wonders, he nearly had a hard attack before his Jounin speed got him out of sight as he was able to watch them carefully from a large tree.

"Hey, Naruto?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I see that book for a second..."

(Naruto gives it to her and she immediately tears it in half)

"Whoops..."

Seeing this horrendous travesty, Kakashi's hands latched unto his head as he released a manly shrill.

"NOW SASUKE!!", the surley voice of Naruto called out from below.

After the call, the Copy Nin ALONG with Sasuke came bursting out of the tree. Completely caught off gaurd by this manuver, Kakashi was crashed to the ground face-first, with Sasuke on his back; crossing his arms together to keep him at bay. Since the raven haired Genin had to use every ounce of strength to hold him down, he couldn't complete the test so easily, so he turned to his comrades.

"NARUTO! SAKURA! DO IT!!!!!", he shouted.

In immediate response, both Naruto and Sakura dived at their sensei with their eyes glued to the prize... Unfortunately... Kakashi's flexable body served to be too much of a vexing nuisance as he bent back and rammed the back of his head into Sasuke's face; sending him reeling back. Now free, the skilled Copy Nin strafed to the side; allowing Naruto to competely miss him and tackle Sasuke instead; leaving Sakura unprotected. He took the oppurtunity, shot to his feet and launched his fist into Sakura's abdomen. With her eyes practically buldging and her body going completly numb due to the force of the blow, the jade eyed Genin folded over; holding her abs as she choked and gasped for air, before crashing to her knees.

With her out of the picture for now, Kakashi turned his murderous glare toward Naruto, who had just got up after accidentally tackling Sasuke. Wasting no time, the Jounin dashed at the blonde, dragged him across the ground and slammed his face into a tree. Kakashi then knelt down next to the dazed Naruto, grabbed his shoulder and slammed his face against the tree again.

"Where's the real book?"

Naruto: ...

(SLAM)

"Where is it you scrawny PUNK?!"

Naruto: Up yours...

(SLAM... SLAM)

"WHERE IS IIIT?!?!?"

Naruto: Right fuckin' here (flips the bird)...

Kakashi's eye widened ridiculously before slamming Naruto's head against the tree so hard that his body crashed right throught it; sending the tree timbering down to the side. After tumbling on the ground before coming to a complete stop, there he lied... motionless.

"... Uh-oh... I... probably shouldn't have done that!", he fretted before running up to the lifeless Naruto only to see him vanish out of existence again.

Kakashi's face fell into a comical squint...

(Zooms out of the country-side)

"MMMRRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!", he howled...

Twenty minutes later...

Naruto, Sakura and Sasuke were hudled up within the trees; collecting themsevles and their thoughts; trying to come up with a plan to get those bells as they watched Kakashi below.

_Naruto: You still have the book of mindless smut...?_

_Sasuke: Yeah... But I'm starting to think that pissing him off like this was a very bad idea. I mean look at him... _

_Naruto: I know... ... ... ... ... _

_Sasuke: Wait... OF COURSE!_

_Naruto: You have a plan?_

_Sasuke: Eh-it'll never work... ... ... ... ..._

_Naruto: Oh... Oh wait, THATS PERFECT!_

_Sasuke: A bright idea?_

_Naruto: Nah-I think yours was better... ... ... ..._

Finding the silence between her two teammates pretty unsettling, Sakura interveined, "Why are you two being so quiet? Or are you both trying to think?", she whispered.

"... No... No I have an idea... But... its risky", Naruto said.

-

A short time passes and Kakashi was still out in the open searching madly for his little students until he nearly snapped.

"Thats it (puts his hand over his forehead protector) I'll show those rotten little-(slaps hand down)-No... ... You're better than that Kakashi. If they didn't have ten minutes left, I'd track them down in a heart-beat but... I have to watch my temper when my book is at stake; lose my cool like that again and I could lose Icha Icha Paradise for good...", he consoled himself; calming down a bit.

Just then, a rustle in the bushes could be heard on the Jounin's right side. Kakashi whirled around with his usual focus now that he was calm and saw blonde boy with an orange jumpsuit walk out of the bushes... holding the BOOK!

"K-Kakashi-sensei...", he began timidly, "I-I think this belongs to you..."

The silver haired man eyed his battered student wearily, "Oh really... And where are the others, Naruto...?", he asked incredulously.

When the only response he got was a down casted look, Kakashi became a little concerned, but kept his gaurd up.

"Well..."

"I... don't understand what I did wrong. All I tried to do was help, but they... they", Naruto began with his voice beginning to shake, "said that they didn't want me on their team to begin with even after I offered a good plan to get those stupid bells"

The one eyed teacher was starting to look a bit doubtful, "What do you mean? What happened?", he asked.

Naruto walked up to his sensei and offered him the book humbly. Kakashi stared down at the wnderous novel before shooting a look at his student again. Not sensing any deception, he took it and stashed it into his pocket.

"They... said that my stupid ideas would only get us killed. They even said that my idea to take the book was stupid. I just wanted (hic) to help...", the blonde Genin said as he cast his head down.

Kakashi was silent.

"What did I ever do to them (hic) to make them hate me so much...", the saddened NAruto questioned.

"... Where are they?", the Jounin asked.

Naruto wiped his eyes, "They... They split up around the forest... waiting for the time to strike without... me", he sorrowfully informed.

"NARUTO!!!!", the angered voices of Sasuke and Sakura roared out.

Both Kakashi and NAruto were immediately alerted when all of the sudden, they came bursting from the bushes; Sakura holding several kunai and Sasuke holding metal wire.

"Y-You guys!", Naruto exclaimed.

"Whats the big idea SELLING US OUT, you little punk?!", Sakura shouted.

"I-"

"You've got a lot of nerve loser. First you nearly get us killed with your amateur plans and now your ratting us out? Looks like someone's asking it, big time!", Sasuke declared with vigor.

"But... But I-"

Sasuke and Sakura: SHUT UP!!!

At the end of those words, the enraged Genin initiated the attacks that were meant for Kakashi... on Naruto.

_"What on Earth_...?", the masked Nin questioned to himself as he saw this developement unfold.

Sakura threw six well aimed kunai at Naruto; an act that kinda got on Kakashi's bad-side before he materialized in front of Naruto and deflected the assault with a single kunai of his own.

"Sakura! What do you think you're-"

"Fire Style-Fire Ball Jutsu!", Sasuke called out.

Kakashi whirled around only to see a GIANT wave of fire waving right toward Naruto... and him. The Copy Nin was flabbergasted! Not only was he blown away by the fact that a GENIN, of all lowly creatures in the world, could perform a jutsu of that calibur but also that it was directed to a teammate. At that moment, Kakashi had enough. He jumped out of the way in time, but quickly noticed that Naruto was still on the wrong end of the attack.

"Naruto!", he yelled before vanishing in a flash of incredible speed, grabbing the frightened boy and jumping to safety once again.

Kakashi landed upon the ground and set Naruto down, where the boy then lifted his forearm over his face began to sob uncontrolably.

"Why? Why?!", he lamented.

Seeing this, the irritated Jounin fronwed VERY deeply_, "What in the HELL_?!", he inwardly cursed, "Naruto... its okay... we're going to put an end to this test and I'll bring Sasuke and Sakura out in the open..."

The blue eyed boy continued his whails of saddness and confusion, "I can't believe it!", he cried.

"Naruto..."

"I just... can't believe... how well... that worked!"

It was at that moment that Sakura and Sasuke appeared beside their now laughting teammate, who still had his face in his forearm. Kakashi's eyes widened to such an extent that they became dry and blood-shot before he shot his head down and saw what he did NOT want to see...

The blinking outlines of where two bells were supposed to be.

Naruto lifted his head up to his shocked sensei with his classic foxy grin; chuckling happily before showing the bell to him.

"We got you GOOD, Kakashi-sensei!", he said with a massive sense of accomplishment.

Naruto's other teammates smiled happily at their achievement as well before he picked himself up and awaited what their sensei had to say about THAT.

"... I... I... am thoroughly impressed. I would've never expected something like that. You have all demonstrated potential that I haven't seen in many years... Not since... well... its been awhile...", he said before letting a very proud smile creep upon his masked lips, "Well done. You are officially the first group of Genin who have seen the true purpose of accomplishing even in the most difficult of missions... Teamwork... You pass"

_Naruto: In your FACE, Uchibus!_

_Sasuke: Yeah, whatever..._

Sakura blushed and averted her eyes, Saskue simply smiled and Naruto laughted triumphantly before falling into a pit of silence.

"We did it!", Sakura shouted with glee

**_"CHA!! Failure be DAMNED, mother fucker!!!!_**

"Yeah...", Saskue silently concurred.

Naruto was the only one who really didn't give a final word of triumph as he now had a very nostalgic and somewhat disappointed smile on his face. Sakura saw this and asked what was wrong.

"Whats wrong Naruto? You don't have anything to say-well thats a first...", she joked.

Actually, there is one word that comes to mind...", Naruto said befoe taking each bell in his hands and tossing them to his friends, "Cheers"

Sakura and Sasuke each caught one bell. The pink haired female stared at her bell, stared back at Naruto in confusion and then her bell again. Sasuke suddenly remembered what his blonde teammate had thought to himself before the test began and harbored a feint look of shame. Sakura looked up again only to see her comrade walking away.

"Naruto? Where are you going?", she asked.

"Hn. Back to the Academy...", Sasuke answered for her as he watched Naruto walk off.

"W-What?! But... why? He-... ... Oh", Sakura suddenly remembered.

The blonde Kitsune waved a farewell hand to his comrades behind him, "You two be careful out on the feild, okay?" he said.

"Wait! Naruto, you... you worked so hard to get here. More than any of us-"

"Don't worry about it Sakura-chan. There's always next year... By then, I'll be twice as strong and I won't have to worry about failing ever again. Good bye", Naruto said without taking another look at his former comrades.

"Naruto, please! I-"

"-Sakura... Let him go... He made this decision on his own and he's sticking with it. Let him do what he know he must", Sasuke said with a somewhat proud smile.

"B-But... Sasuke-kun-"

"Don't you worry...", Kakashi interveined, "No ones going back to the academy this day..."

hearing these words, Naruto stopped in his tracks and turned around to look at his sensei, "What?", he said.

The proud Jounin smiled again, "When I say that you pass, I meant all of you. Your true test was not to get the bells... it was to display what you have all flawlessly achieved... Teamwork. As of today, all three of you are Genin", he declared.

This was more than enough for Naruto to shout to the Heavans and dash back to his squad; inwarldy crying with joy that he wouldn't have to seperate from either of them... as was Sakura...

* * *

**_PHEW!!!!!!! Now that was awesome and I hope you guys think so too! For those who are still into this Havoc, I will do something special for you guys and gals! Who ever can guess the correct answer of how Sasuke and Naruto became mentally linked, can choose ANY event to happen in future chapters! For the one person who can get it right first; make it a GOOD ONE!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	8. Time to Move on

_**Naruto**_

_**The Chaos Knight**_

**_Me: So, my half-witted alter ego; how have you decided to continue your meaningless babble so I can laugh at it?_**

**_Craine: First of all, fuck you too, and second, I don't know. I've been contemplating how I should do this for too long and my fans have probably all left me... ... .. Fuck_**

**_Me: Well, I don't suppose you can just pull off one of your ridiculous dread-locks and make an idea leak out of your head... that might help. I mean, this is you we're talking about._**

**_Craine: You think I haven't tried that?! Dammit, I've actually racked my brains out trying to continue this story!_**

**_Me: Damn... Did it hurt?_**

**_Craine: Yeah a little, but don't worry; a couple of Tylenol and I'll be back to my old self_**

**_Me: You act like I'm supposed to take that as good news_**

**_Craine: Again... Fuck you too_**

**_Some Guy Named Joe: Unless you have some sort of magical TV that magically allows you to see how this half-witted conversation will end, I suppose its time for you all to prepare for the CHOAS!!... ... ... There... I said_**

Chapter Eight: Time to Move on

* * *

A smiling Naruto Uzumaki was proudly walking down the partially crowded dirt roads of Konoha as he basked in the imminent glory that was his success. His team's completion of the Bell Test left him utterly excited about what adventures they would surely encounter as a team, so much so, that he just couldn't stop smiling. One thing he did know was that him and the rest of his team would be taking their first mission exactly three days from then.

The young Jinchuuriki found himself to be more aware of his surrounding ever since the day of 'Passing'. The wind blowing through his hair and the leaves dancing around the air had kept him calm enough to prevent himself from jumping up and down to this very day, though he was still ecstatic beyond belief...

Too bad for him Nature had other plans, huh?

As another one of those inexplicable moments occurred, one of the dancing leaves that just so happened to be flowing with the wind was on a direct collision with Naruto's head. Mind you, he WAS perfectly aware of the leave, but since it just that, he really didn't care... or at least he would've, had he suspected that the very same leaf would barely tap against his cheek and send him careening into the nearest wall... which it did.

The people present to this mysterious atrocity gasped in shock. The next thing they all knew, the very same blonde slowly peeled off of the wall where a nearly perfect indent of his body was left. Naruto fell face-first to ground and lied silent for a few seconds before he whipped his head off the ground with a penetrating scowl on his face... focused directly on the fluttering leaf that evidently _attacked_ him.

"You _son _of a BITCH!!", Naruto cursed before he shot to his feet with a fist curled tightly, "Whats the big idea blind-siding me you little pussy?!"

Leaf: ...

"No YOU shut up! How dare you attack _me_ and tell _me_ to shut up you jerk!"

Leaf: ... ...

"What you MEAN I was in your space?! Don't feed me that crap!!"

Leaf: ... ... ... ...

"Oh YEAH?! Well how about I come over there and kick yer ASS?! HUH?! YOU THINK YOU CAN TAKE A PIECE O' THIS?!"

Leaf: ... ...

"YOU MOTHER FUCKER!!"

With that last verbal assault and total lack of rememberance for the people watching, Naruto completely lost it and charged at the inanimate object with an intent to hurt. He swung, kicked, grappled and even went so far as to lunge at his target but the wind seemed as though it were playing favorites that day as the leaf was effortlessly dancing around all of the wild attacks. When Naruto threw yet another punch at the elusive plant, he was thworted by a gust of wind that launch his target not only passed his fist... but directly into his face.

The angry blonde stumbled back holding his aching nose before he opened his eyes only to have his face assaulted again by the leaf, this time flipping him over and face-planting him into the ground with his legs in the air. When the blonde's legs fell to the ground the leaf slowly fluttered downward. When it landed upon Naruto's back a massive ripple erupted from the ground and the boy screamed in pain. When he collapsed flat again it seemed as though the leaf had won the day over...

That is until Naruto quickly rolled over and caught it in mid-air.

"GOTCHA-ya little fuck!", the blue eyed ninja yelled as he held the troublesome leaf by it's stem, "Thought ya had me there didn't ya?!"

Unnoticed by Naruto, three more leaves flew into the fray, carried by the wind. To anyone else, they seemed like harmless plants... but then...

"What the-!"

**BAM!! **

One of the extra leaves slammed into Naruto's back knee, making him kneel to the ground and unintentionally release to leaf he had in hand. Another one of the leafs flew out of nowhere and collided with the boy's abdomen, effectively folding him over. The third leaf of the new party pitched in it's two cents by slamming into the back of Naruto's head, dropping him to his hands. Finally, the leaf that started it all took it on home with a mind blowing crash to the face, sending Naruto soaring through the air until he crashed through the window of a certain flower shop.

--

**_MEANWHILE IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

Fukyouwan, the God of Chaos was standing before the Holy Pool of Visions with a troubled expresion on his face and a hand to his chin.

"Hmmm... This could be a problem... He's developing far too quickly. He's already starting to affect the forces of nature at such an under-evolved state... At this rate-...", he pondered before he was interrupted by two familiar voice.

"You're still-"

"-watching the boy, Fukyouwoan?"

The black robed God sighed, "Raijin. Fuujin. Must you always come here to see my progress? What is there to see; I'm just sitting in front of a damn pool watching the mortals carry out their meaningless lives", he said.

"Yeah right. If you were actually watching anyone else accept for Naruto you'd be fucking with them in the most descreet and screwed up way, you liar", Fuujin protested.

"And don't try to deny it. The only thing you've even been able to think about thus far is how that blonde brat will serve as the next Chaos Knight. Well let me tell you that it will NOT happen within _this_ decade", Raijin concurred.

Again, Fukyouwaon sighed, "You two... really know how to work on a God's last nerve. And don't think I don't know why you're really here. I've told you time and time again... "I WILL NOT PLAY POKER WITH YOU ANY LONGER!!"... Remember... I swear, that game is the Devil", he claimed with conviction while keeping his eyes glued on what was happening down-under.

The brothers of Lightening and Wind both crossed their arms and scoffed, "Do what you will, Fukyouwoan...", the both stated simaltaneously but dissapearing within a meshed flurry of their own elements, finally leaving their fellow God to think to himself in peace.

_"Hmmm... How can I possibly quell this over-growth before it gets out of hand? I must plan this out quickly"_

--

Back in the Mortal Realm...

Naruto heard echoing voices ring throughout the seemingly infinite darkness that swallowed his entire vision. The voices sounded familiar; familiar enough to slowly but surely bring his senses back to the surface. The slumbering blonde found his awareness returning to him and in turn, he recognised the voices a little clearly. The darkness steadily dissapated as he cracked his eyes open, exhaling a few groggy moans.

_'Hey, I think he's waking up, Ino'_

_'Well no shit, Forehead'_

Shutting his eyes tightly to wake himself up a little more, Naruto suddenly SHOT to a sitting position with wild and angry eyes.

"FIGHT ME LIKE YA GOT A PAIR, YA WORTHLESS, PHOTOSYNTHESIZING LITTLE-... Oh... Hey Sakura... Ino...", he calmly greeted the two females sitting beside him.

Ignoring the wildly questioning stares that he got from Ino and Sakura, Naruto rose to his feet and stretched his body out to relieve his joints of the achiness they were engulfed by, reflexably walking forward. Exhaling a sigh of relief, the blue eyed Genin turned back to his lady company (who, by the way, were still staring).

"How long was I out?", he asked.

Ino was the first to speak, "We'll answer that question when you answer mine. What could have possibly happened to make you fly through the window of my mom's flower shop?", she asked with an obvious hint of annoyance in her voice.

"Oh, that? Yeah sorry... Some ass-wipe picked a fight with me and I friggin' lost... We both know the results of that... I swear, I almost had him until he called his little possy to help him out... ... Coward", Naruto cursed under his breath as he vividly remembered every pattern on the green face of that bastard Leaf.

For some unknown reason, Ino wasn't satisfied with that answer.

"Well what did you do to piss the guy off?", she asked.

This, however, got a more... uncharacteristic response from the blonde boy.

"What did **I** do?! I'm not the one who up and started it by blind-siding him like I owned the place. Talkin' about 'You were in my space'! FUCK your space you dubious little-... ... Sorry... that just got me in a really bad mood is all", Naruto admitted while rubbing his temples.

It was at that moment that Sakura finally realized the dark marks under her teammate's eyes.

_"He... hasn't gotten that much sleep lately...", _the pink haired kunoichi thought to herself.

Unfortunately for Sakura, Naruto had caught her staring and for the first time since he had known the girl, it was ACTUALLY starting to make him uncomfortable. So much so that he fidgeted a little and simply had to stop looking at her. It was right then and their that he remembered one very important detail...

He didn't like either of the two girls that were in his presence...

"Well... thanks for lookin' out for me, ladies, but I HAVE to go. I'll be seeing you at the mission tomorrow, Sakura. Later", Naruto said before he hurriedly walked out the door of the Yamanaka Flower shop.

Once the blonde boy finally exited the shop, a few moments of silence between the two females, allowing Sakura to wonder what Naruto meant by what he said. That is until Ino finally broke the ice.

"Jeez, Sakura. He sure was in a hurry to get away from you wasn't he?", he taunted.

At this, Sakura snapped her attention away from where Naruto exited and scoffed at Ino's comment.

"Cha right, Ino. In case you or the entire student body hadn't realized, the last thing on Naruto's mind is getting away from _me_", Sakura stated a little too haultily.

Ino raised an eyebrow at this, "My, my. SOMEone's full of herself isn't she?", she mocked.

Sakura crossed her arms and threw her nose in the air, "Well its not my fault if he's crazy about me. Hn-not like you", she claimed.

At this, the bleach blonde kunoichi's eye twitched, "Wait, what the Hell does that mean, Forehead? You're acting like you're the only one he looks at. Don't be so conceited", she said with a little of her irritation showing on her face and through her voice.

"I don't see him asking _you_ out every fifteen minutes, now do I?"

"Well I didn't hear the usual suffix to your name this time around, did I?"

Sakura flinched... and Ino caught it.

"Did I?", the turquoise eyed female pressed on.

"S-So what? That was probably just a one time thing. I bet by tomorrow, he'll be asking me out again"-_"So long as I finally get the chance to talk to him..."_, Sakura inwardly admitted.

Ino put a finger to her chin, "Oh, I don't know, Sakura. He seemed awefully upset", she pried on.

Thats when Sakura changed the subject, "Well none of this really matters anyway. Afterall, its not like _you're_ the one on Sasuke-kun's team, now are you?", she said, hoping to get a raise out of her rival.

A vein revealed itself upon Ino's forehead at that last comment but before she could even respond to that crack a voice called out from above. They both looked up to see Naruto lying upon the roof of the shop talking to them via the open ceiling window.

"_Well_... Not that I'm uninterested in how this hair-brained conversation will turn out, but I think I'll stop you both right here. First off; Sakura, you're way too full of yourself. Just because I liked you alot doesn't make me a drone. Ino... ... ... you're a bitch. Sakura was right about one thing... I wouldn't go out with you if you cried and begged me to", Naruto stated before simple leaving the girls sight.

Naruto had left both Ino and Sakura with their mouths haging wide open. Of all people... Naruto was the absolute last... They never imagined that he would be so blunt. In essence, this entire ordeal upset them, but it was no surprise that those feelings quickly changed to shame and realization.

Before they could even utter a single word to each other, Naruto zipped back to the open ceiling window.

"See ya arounnnd llladies!", he soluted before dashing away and jumping off of the Flower Shop.

After that, the water-works turned for Ino. Though she was still fixated on the open ceiling-window, Sakura could have sworn that she heard sobbing. Knocked off by this, the pink haired female looked over to Ino and saw that she was actually crying. It sent a slight ping through her chest.

"That hurts... Did... Did he have to call me (hic) a bitch?", she sobbed knowing that she deserved it.

Sakura turned away to avoid the risk of falling to tears herself. It was after Naruto's blatant speech that Sakura realized that she had made a terrible mistake, and she felt the obligation to atone for it.

She got up and ran out of the Shop.

-

As Naruto continued his 'venting' walked, he had to admit that he was starting to feel a little better. Although he also deduced that it may also be because he said what he needed to say.

_"Seriously, the last thing I need right now is one of them running back to me and showering me with appologies... Not today"_, Naruto thought to himself.

However, if Nature, Charma and Fate betting against him these last couple of days was any indication, his wish would not come true.

"Naruto!", the voice of Sakura called out, "Naruto, wait!"

Even though his inner conscience was telling him-no-SCREAMING at him to ignore the voice and keep walking, Naruto stopped.

_"What am I doing_?...", the blonde thought to himself as he prepared for what was to come.

Once Sakura reached her target, she stopped and immediately said what she had to say.

"Naruto, don't be mad at me! I only said those things to make Ino-pig shut up! I didn't mean-"

"Oh come off it, Sakura. You and I both know that everything you said was half of what you meant. Well I hate to burst you're little bubble, but after knowing how you really feel AND hearing those words from you only minutes ago... I'm officially over you", the blue eyed blonde stated without even turning to look at Sakura.

Normally, such words from Naruto would send flying through the roof with joy. But given the current circumstances, she was actually close to falling to her knees and begging for his forgiveness. The scornful vibe that he gave off nearly crippled her and all she wanted to do was appologize and make amends.

"B-But Naruto... Please... I didn't want-... (GASP)"

Sakura's words were flung right back into her mouth and Naruto turned his head around to look at Sakura... with a tear-streak marking his face.

"Maybe you didn't hear me the first time. I know how you really feel... and I'm officially _over_ you. I don't care what you say; I don't care you do, but right now, I can't even be within ten feet of you", Naruto said with scornful wrath dripping off of his voice for the first time.

Sakura never imagined that she'd this side of Naruto. Once she saw the his face, she knew... She knew that every smile Naruto wore was a mask. As happy as Naruto seemed (and as annoying as it may have been), it was just too hard to grasp that the kid had a hard life. But seeing the look on his face now, it was blatantly obvious that he was masterfully hiding a level of pain that only he could ever know.

And now he showed it to Sakura.

_"What have I done?..."_, she questioned herself while unwittingly biting upon her thumb, "I'm... I'm so sorry, Naruto"

"I'll see you at the mission Sakura... and _not_ before"

Now officially unable to look at the pink haired bitch any longer, Naruto turned-tail and walked away, uttering words that couldn't have been more appropriate for this moment.

"Its time to move on..."

* * *

**_Short but sweet... Thats what this chapter was to me. Though the lack of Chaos has caused a part of me to die inside. OH WELL!! I hope you're all still with me, cause like all of my stories, they'll only get better from here!!_**

**_Peace..._**


	9. The AntiLaws of a Chaos Knight

**_Naruto_**

**_The Chaos Knight_**

**_Hey there... Well, I've been able to think a bit and reflect on a few things about my writing as of late. As many people may be aware of, writer's block happens to people in different ways. For some, its either a lack of inspiration or bordem... for others, its laziness or loss of direction/interest. My problem, is the fact that I had fogotten what I enjoyed about writing in the first place. While reading a few of the stories I have written in the past (not on the net), I realized that when I feel the need to type and then stop after 100 words or so, its because there was no real passion in it._**

**_Thats whats been happening with all of my stories lately, and now that I know that, perhaps I can tackle the problem and snap its neck with ruthless abandon by writing the way I'm supposed to. Wish me luck everyone... 'cause I know you're all itching for more updates._**

**_Continuation is a BLESSING!!_**

**_PS: This takes place two weeks after the last chapter._**

* * *

Chapter 9: The Anti-laws of a Chaos Knight

* * *

Central Building of Konoha...

A simple D-ranked mission... retrieve that DAMN cat for the Daimyou's wife... Typical. Team 7, as far as Naruto was concerned, was being cut shit for slack when it came to the missions that were being given to them. The lack of any real action was starting to get to the blonde Genin greatly. What purpose was it for a ninja to watch kids, do laundry, apprehend blood-thirsty cats and all of that meaningless which-rather?

NONE, thats what!

This, of course, was all of concern as far as the _missions _went. Naruto's _real _dilemma was the slew of strange things that have been happening to him and the area around him. The inexplicable things that his body had been going through and his random outburst were MUCH more than just a little... unsettling, not to mention frightening to some degree. But what caught Naruto's attention the most (as if a 90 degree angled spine wasn't a factor), were his MASSIVE mood-swings.

Enduring the hardships of just being him, has hardened his ability to hide any and all of his negative emotions with a mask of false happiness. However, his little confrontation with Sakura and Ino before his first mission as a Genin, didn't exactly represent that little factor of his personality; he totally lost it. After he had left Sakura to rot, Naruto went to his apartment and felt worse than he had ever felt about anything in his miserable life.

He knew what he was doing and saying to her, but at the time, he simply didn't care. That was not like him in the absolute slightest and he knew it. He would especially hold his tongue around Sakura because of how much respect and love he held for her. What bothered him more, was that as he chewed her ass out, he felt something deep within him; a strange and wild sensation. One that loosened all of his emotions and shut down his brain inhibitors (meaning he held no words back).

He felt willful and free; as if nothing could hold him back from _anything_.

But this was not to last. Once he was able to isolate himself, Naruto felt lower than the filthy dirt he walked on. He tried to think of anything... ANYTHING he could say to let Sakura and Ino know that he was sorry. A simple apology didn't seem like enough to either of them. As far as he knew, based on his observations of them, they were a bit too high-maintenance for a simple apology. Of course, thinking like that only made him feel more and more helpless on the matter.

Even now, at the Central building, he was debating over what he could possibly say to the pink haired female next to him, despite the fact that he should have been listening to the mission success details.

Little did _he_ know, that same pink haired female was troubled about the same subject...

Sakura felt TERRIBLE about herself after what Naruto had said to her two weeks prior to this day. A small peice of her believed that she didn't deserve that kind of treatment from anyone like Naruto, but the dominant part of her knew she had that coming for a loooooong time. Every searing word Naruto uttered to her was as painful as it was truthful, and now, more than ever, she wanted to make things right with him.

But for reasons that she assumed were massively obvious, Naruto seemed to be avoiding her at every turn.

She blamed him not, for Sakura knew that she must have grossly resembled the Bubonic Plague to him. Perfect example was the high-pitched scream that he lamented when he turned around and abruptly came face to face with her before running for the hills. That, alone, nearly made her chase him down and demand that he listen to what she had to say, though deciding against it.

Deep down, Sakura knew that Naruto probably needed more time, and although she wished she could make him listen, she also knew that attempting so could only make things worse...

So she waited.

If there was anything that both Genin were aware of, it was that they needed something to keep them occupied... to ease their minds of this particular matter. How was this possible?... Mission after mission.

"Well... I'm happy to see that your Team's success rate on these mission hasn't faltered Kakashi", the Sandaime Hokage, Sarutobi (who was accompanied by Iruka said).

The said Copy Nija bowed politely, "Thank you, Hokage-sama", he said.

Sarutobi rummaged through a few sheets of paper that layed on his desk, "It may interest you to know that we are quite bountiful in our missions these days and we'd like for you and your team to partake in them", he informed.

Kakashi inwardly sighed, "May I ask what they are?", he asked.

"Well, since there hasn't been much help with trash duty, babysitting and what-not, we have-"

"Oh give me break!"

The grey haired Kage looked up and saw a scowling Naruto with his hand up, "Whats that?", he responded.

Kakashi: _Here we go..._

"I don't mean to be rude or 'insubordinate', but are you serious?... Are you _serious, _Old Man?? For God's sake, we're Ninja! Why have we been stuck all of these petty missions. In fact, how can they even be _called_missions if we aren't experiencing any real danger or anything. Lets do something more exciting!", Naruto complained.

Iruka would not be havin' any of that, "You idiot! Neither you nor your teammates have enough experience to do anything more than these D-ranked mission. You should be honored just to be helping out your village in any way you can", he declared.

"Yeah, I get that much, but how can you possibly think that we'll get any valuable experience by doing these little 'chores'. If I'm not terribly mistaken, the fact that we're Ninja now, means that we should be going on dangerous missions to help out the village more", Naruto persisted.

Sarutobi sighed, "Naruto... While I understand your sentiments, it seems you need a lesson in how the missions work, "he said in his oh so pattened 'elder' voice.

The very moment that he heard the word 'lesson', Naruto's eyes dimmed out as he let out a big yawn. It would have been considered a perfectly normal reaction from someone like Naruto, IF(!) his entire jaw didn't overly expand and become mammoth-huge when he did so. Sarutobi and Iruka's faces fell into blank stares of hidden shock when they saw this. Naruto's teammates were facing the Hokage's direction to even notice, yet they were aware of the yawn.

After three seconds of silence, Sarutobi cleared his throat and began his little lecture about missions, ninja rank, and all of that boring shit that I won't dare to even get into because we already KNOW IT!!

/\/\/\

**_MEANWHILE, IN THE REALM OF THE GODS_**

A flustered Fukyouwaon was intently watching the blonde enigma as he pondered rigorously on a solution for his inconvenient over-growth. He'd plowed through countless plans; all of which had no real rhyme or reason, and thus, held no real solution. For weeks, the God of Chaos fumbled through various plots and schemes that didn't involve tearing the very fabric of reality in any way, shape or form...which proved to be quite a challenge considering the fact that Chaos was the issue here...

Ya never know WHAT the fuck would happen.

"Its the same problem every damn time; when ever Chaos of this magnitude and potential is involved, I get screwed. How the HELL is this possible when I'M THE GOD OF CHAOS?! I had no idea things had such a thick chance spiraling out of control", Fukyouwaon thought out loud before facing one of golden pillars of the Poo lof Visions, "Think Fukyouwaon, you chronic mentally unsustainable bastard (slams his head against the pillar), THINK!!"

With a sudden and short-lived surge of black electricity roaming upon his cranium, the black-robed God continued to mentally reherse plans and schemes. After much deliberation, he reached in his robe and relinqueshed a black book, outlined with a golden trim. He stared at the book blankly for a while before he looked back into the Pool of Visions.

"Hmmmmm... I wonder if he would get upset if I let Naruto barrow this for a while... ... Mah-he'll never figure it out", Fukyouwaon said to himself before he tossed the book into the Holy contraption, "This should buy some time for me to find a way to settle this matter... _personally..."_

Once the deed was done, the Dark God crossed his arms and began to think hard... that is, of course, until he was interupted by a deeply defined and rugged voice.

"Fukyouwaon..."

The black robed diety reopened his eyes and took in the new presence, "Well... Didn't think you'd find your way back here", he said.

"Well it was because of no desire to see your ugly mug, if thats what you're implying", the mysterious stranger said, "I actually came here to get my book"

Fukyouwan's eyes widened when he heard those words, "Your um... _book_? What book?", he asked as he tried to surpress his nervousness.

"My book... Ya know; the book that I let you borrow. A lot has happened in the last two hundred years and I finally know a way to finish it", the stranger explained.

"O-Oh... that book... ... Well... you see there's a funny story behind that one, friend-"

"You threw it down into the Mortal Realm... didn't you"

Fukyouwaon grew silent.

The stranger sighed, "... Have I ever told you how much I hate you as of late?", he asks.

"I'd very much appretiate if you didn't", the God of Chaos responded.

"How could you have put literature NOT MEANT FOR HUMAN EYES, in the MORTAL REALM?!"

"... ... ... Oh-I'm sorry, was inclined to answer that quesiton?"

The stranger slapped his forehead in exasperation before pointing and an accusing finger at the black-robed God.

"You... are going down there... to get my FUCKING book!", he demanded.

Fukyouwaon clapped his hands together, "There in lies the problem, old friend; ya see, we gods aren't allow to personally metal in mortal affairs. Thats why I'm conducting certain... experiments from up here. Get my meaning; if a god such as myself just waltzed his merry way into the mortal world without some kind of permission or intentional self-degradation... well... you should know better than anyone, what would happ-...", the dark god stopped in mid-sentence as he noticed that the stranger was gone.

He turned around and the LAST thing he saw was his aquaintance dropping into the pool himself. Fukyouwaon's jaw hung open as he witnessed such a pre-apocalyptic event...

"Oh... crap"

/\/\/\

Back in the Mortal Realm

After much convincing (but predominant bitching), Naruto finally got Sarutobi into allowing him and his team to attend a C-ranked mission. This was a chance to engage in some actual and much needed (in Naruto's eyes) excitement and danger. Finally, the opportunity he's been WAITING for was afoot! The only down-side to this momentous occaision was the fact that a cranky and crabby old man named Tazuna joined the picture.

But, of course, how could it be helped... he was the object of the mission. This little factor was definatly NOT on Naruto's list of things he loved. In fact, he and Tazuna didn't exactly get along... at all.

As the grey haired man observed Team 7 for the second time since he was introduced, he finally came to solid conclusions about each of them.

Sasuke was a brooding emo.

Sakura was a bitch in disguise.

Naruto was an idiot

And Kakashi was just plain lazy.

He inwardly questioned if there had been some sort of mistake. If these were the people that he trusted his life to, than Tazuna may as well jump off of a bridge; at least, thats what _he_thought. The meat of his worries, however, mostly lied on the blonde, hyperactive one, who was naturally over-come with excitement about his first real mission. Tazuna could understand his reasons of course, but...

seriously?... Acting so childish because of _that_?

"Hey, kid...", Tazuna rudely called out.

At the sound of that voice and the tone it outed into the air, Naruto threw on a rather comical sneer and stared at the rude old man in response to his call.

"Are you sure you're a Ninja?", Tazuna questioned in an almost mocking sense, "Because you certainly don't look or sound anything of the sort"

At this, Naruto grew VERY defensive.

"Wha-! Of COURSE I'm a Ninja! And what do ya mean I don't look or sound like the sort?!", the blonde boy questioned loudly.

The spiky haired old man pushed up his eye-glasses, "I mean, I don't know if I wanna entrust my safety to a knuckled-brained idiot like you. I mean, look at you; can you even fight?", he said.

"Can I even WHAT?!", Naruto shouted in disbelief, "Oh, thats IT; I've had enough with your STUPID QUESTIONS, old man! I AM a Ninja, I CAN fight and I'M gonna be Hokage some day!"

At hearing that last bit, Tazuna almost laughed for the first time since he arrived in Konoha... but simply scoffed it off.

"You... a village leader?", the gray haired bridge-builder said, "Don't make me laugh. The day an idiot like you becomes Hokage is the day I sprout wings and fly"

Naruto's cheeks puffed up with anger as he tried with all of his might not to go A-wall on this asshole. His face slowly fell into a light shade of red and Tazuna awaited to see his reaction with hidden enjoyment. Naruto clinched his teeth as he shook with anger.

_Sasuke: Hey! Don't blow it, you idiot. If you do anything stupid you could blow our chances of even attending this mission._

_Naruto: But he's SO ASKING FOR IT!! I swear to God, Sasuke, I'm gonna kill him; I'm gonna FUCKING KILL HIM!!_

_Sasuke: Just--keep--cool. All we have to do is take him back to his village. So you won't have to worry about any of his insults when we're done._

_Naruto: Oh... okay, I guess thats coo-... Wait a second... Isn't it a three day trip to get to Mizu no Kuni?_

_Sasuke: ... ... ..._

_Naruto: FUCKING-A!!_

After the mental conversation, Naruto actually managed to calm down some before simply turning away from Tazuna and walking ahead of the group with his arms folded behind his head. Watching the whole thing with little interest, the team leader Kakashi, concluded that the hot-headed Naruto had the right idea; to leave while it was still daylight. With his silent signal, the silver haired Jonin signaled to the others and they followed.

The steaming blonde continued on his way, inwardly cursing the old man behind him. But because of his simmering anger, one of his profanities slipped out of his mouth in a slight whisper.

"Douche-bag..."

"What the HELL DID YOU JUST SAY?!", Tazuna yelled from behind as he quickened his pace to catch up with Naruto.

"What, can you not hear me?", he responded.

"No, I _can't_hear you! SAY IT AGAIN!!", the angry old man yelled again as he was now directly behind the defiant blonde.

Naruto turned and faced Tazuna, getting right in his face (at least as much as he could, given there difference in height).

"I called you a DOUCHE-BAG!! There, did ya here that one?!"

"You... insubordinate little-!"

Seeing how the hopeless situation could've turned out, Kakashi sighed and intervened.

"I suggest that we keep our voices at a minimum volume from this point out", he calmy suggested, "Don't want to... disturb the peaceful ego-system, now do we?"

Naruto and Tazuna gave that little suggestion some consideration as they traded penetrating sneers toward one another. Before anything could escalate, Naruto decided to break the whole thing off at once. With a hearty 'hrumph!', the blue eyed Jinchuuriki, turned-tail and walked ahead of the group again.

Sakura stared at the walking Naruto, saddened and slightly dismayed. She wanted to run to him and explain herself right than and there. She probably would have done just that, had it not been for the level of disrespect that Naruto was just dealt. Sakura surmised that he really wouldn't be in a listening mood after being talked down to like that. Hell she wouldn't have been a happy camper, herself.

_"Oh Naruto...", _the pink haired Genin thought solemnly, "_If only I could just-..."_

Sakura knew that Tazuna didn't have to be so rotten to Naruto. So he was a little excited about going on a mid-ranked mission; big deal? It most certainly didn't mean that he should have been regarded so poorly; and from a geezer none of them even knew? Now even though Sakura still had a distaste for Naruto's antics here and there, she still considered his feelings and was extremely careful...

At least, now she was.

Putting all else aside until the time was right, Sakura, Sasuke, Kakashi and the reluctant Tazuna followed Naruto. UNFORTUNATELY(!), traveling in peace seemed to be a long-distant luxury as Naruto was suddenly struck in the diaphragm by an object that fell from the sky like an asteroid. The force of the blow sent him flipping and tumbling all the way back to Konoha's gates.

Coming to a stop, only when he hit his head against one of the giant wooden doors, Naruto struggled for breath.

"A-HOA!... Oh God...! My diaphragm...! A-HOUGH!", Naruto writhed in agony.

Kakashi immediately went into red alert and expanded his senses for any pulse of alien chakra.

"Protect the Bridge-builder!", he ordered.

On that wim, Sasuke and Sakura huddled around Tazuna in a defensive stance; each withdrawing their kunai knives. All manner of thinking was abandoned as they all prepared themselves for anything. However... nothing happened, and Kakashi found himself an empty plate; he didn't sense even a trace of enemy chakra. No intent to kill, no quickened heart-beats... nothing at all.

Slowly, Kakashi allowed his gaurd to lower as much as he could allow it and told his subordinates to stand down, but he remained cautious and kept his vision wide and clear. Sasuke managed to calm his mind enough to remember that Naruto had been knocked away. With a casual shrug, the Uchiha turned around and ran back to the gates, following the trail of shifted dirt left in the wake of Naruto's little tumble.

When he found the blonde Genin unharmed, he relaxed as stood a few meters away from him.

"Hey. You alright?", he asked.

Sasuke didn't exactly get an answer out of Naruto, for he seemed entirely fixated on the object that caused and accompanied him during his tumble; a glowing black book with a golden trim. Naruto seemed mesmerised by the book, most likely due to the shining. Only after another call from his teammate, did he snap out of it and stand up.

"What's that?", Sasuke questioned.

"I-I have no idea", Naruto responded without taking his eyes off of the book, "Since when did it rain books all of a sudden?"

"Who cares. Just put it in your back-pack and lets get going before they leave us behind", Sasuke said.

"Oh, gottcha"

With that, Naruto stashed the book into his back-pack and ran to catch up with the others.

-

Back within Konoha...

The slightly disturbed Shikamaru Nara walked down the streets of the village with his hands in his pockets. He was shaken by the unusal experiments that were conducted upon him when he went to the hospital.

_"I mean, seriously; what other twisted inconvievable nonsense do they have brewin' in that shit-hole", _Shikamaru inwardly questioned, _"They totally forgot about my damn bite wound... I hope the Cloud Gods punish them good"_

Despite all of the mind twisting experiments done on him, Shikamaru still had two major issues; one, being his unusal bite wound (recieved from Naruto)that, for some odd reason, bled out whenever we wrapped it up with a bandage; and two, being his hair. For an even STRANGER reason, his hair was no longer stuck as a static-charged afro-puff. Instead, it was divided into several thicks strands; strands that swayed and flowed within the air like it was underwater...

even when there was no wind blowing.

Shikamaru tried his damndest to ignore the dauting and curious stares he got from the other cursed at the fact that even the simplest solution was no longer plausible.

_"Dammit; who ever heard of hair that couldn't be cut. I swear, something really screwy's goin' on around here", _the wild-haired Genin thought to himself as he continued down the dirt-road.

Suddenly, Shikamaru heard a rather familiar voice from around the corner of one of the buidling he approached. After only a second, he recognized the voice and silently decided that he should steer clear of the person who owned it as much as humanly possible... Or at least he would've, had there not been heaving sobs involved.

He perched himself against the edge of the corner to listen in before immediately went into critical thinking mode with the situation at hand.

On one hand, if he avoided this like the pleague it really was, than he could potentially escape the terrible venting that was sure to come... but on the other hand, his self-serving avoidance would SURELY lead to a future arguement a _year_ from than. Grimacing at the alternative, Shikamaru sighed with exsasperation... and emerged from the corner to confront a crying Ino.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at how tear-soaked Ino's face was; she was obviously crying for quite a while.

_"Damn... must've been pretty bad if it has her shaken up this much...", _the young shadow wielder thought before deciding to make his presence known, "Ino?-"

"I'M SORRY, OKAY?!", the platinum blonde yelled in a blind desperation

Shikamaru flinched back at the sudden response. When Ino realized that she just yelled at her teammate, she sunk into the bench she sat upon.

"Oh, sorry, Shikamaru... I thought you were someone else", she said sadly before looking at him in confusion, "What's up with your hair?

"Long story...", the lethargic boy said before taking a seat next to Ino, " Now, I don't suppose this 'someone else' is the reason you're all choked up?"

Ino sunk even further into the bench and looked more saddened than before. As much as his trouble senses were going hay-wire, Shikamaru plowed through his reluctance and did something that he wasn't used to doing in the slightest... offering a shoulder.

"Well... if you need to talk-"

"Okay-so Sakura was getting all high-horse about Sasuke-kun being on her team and I wanted to show her what was what, so I used him to make Sakura hate Sasuke-kun but it didn't work-Instead it totally back-fired, he found out how much she hated him, my plan failed, I freaked out on the guy for something that I talked him into-he crashes through my Mom's flower-shop, he wakes up minutes later, walks out-Sakura got on my last nerve with her little attitude-she's all like 'it doesn't matter' and I was like 'yeah right' and she all 'the student-body' and the bullshit-and... and... and he called me a bitch!", Ino ranted at an uncontrolable speed.

Not only was Shikamaru's mind numb from ACTUALLY being able to prossess everything that he just heard, but his mouth was haging open from surprise at how Ino was able to say all of that without taking in a single breath of air. Barely able to shake out of that daze, the raven haired Nara cleared his throat.

"More of your pointless boy-trouble?"

"What do ya mean POINTLESS?!", Ino shrilled as she wiped the exess tears off her face, "I'm in a _major_ _crisis_ here!"

Shikamaru scoffed, "Crisis, indeed. If you could just accept the fact that Sasuke isn't on your team, and never will be, you could avoid your troublesome little crisis", he said uncaringly.

"No, no, NO! You're missing the point! This isn't about Sasuke-kun anymore! Its about-... u-umm", Ino stopped upon finishing.

At hearing (dare I say it) hesitation, of all things, in Ino's voice, Shikamaru raised a rather curious eyebrow. Ino being shy about a boy or anyone else, is like Choji losing an eating contest... deliciously absurd... He simply HAD to hear this one.

"Its abooouuut??", Shikamaru pried.

The platinum blonde kunoichi had to resist biting her nails out of nervousness; she wasn't really sure if she was ready to reveal such sensative info.

"Well-I... uh... I-"

"Look, I can't help if you don't tell me"

"I know, but... you'd laugh", Ino timidly swayed with a embarassed blush.

"And what possible enjoyment could I reap off of this?...", the narrowed eyed Genin pointed out.

_"He makes a good point", _Ino thought with a bit of a comical sneer, "_But... still"_

The young Yamanaka seemed like she would comply, but, yet again, Shikamaru was declined of the info when she stared down at the ground and sighed.

"I-I don't know"

With a sigh, the lazy Ninja threw a suggestion out there, "Okay, lets take this one little step at a time then. Do I know the guy?", he asked.

Ino nervously pressed one foot over the other and twidled her thumbs together, "Well... more or less; I guess so", she said.

"... Alright, has he graduated with us or is he still at the academy?"

"He, uh... graduated"

Ino was starting to grow more and more reluctant to let this continue. Even more so, when she looked up and saw Shikamaru's eyes widen with anticipation. She inwardly groaned.

"You don't have to think about it too hard...", Ino said, still unwilling to say it right-up-front.

"Well at least give me a hint", the eager boy suggested.

This time, Ino cursed under her breath by accident. But since she was aware that her teammate caught it, it was too late to take it back. She swallowed hard.

"A hint... okay", she began with even more hesitation than before, "H-He... likes Sakura"

Ino was com-PLETELY unable to finish that sentence when Shikamaru began laughing hysterically as he threw his arms into the air before falling off the side of the bench and landing on the side of his head.

"NARUTO CALLED YOU A BITCH?!?", Shikamaru howled with laughter.

Ino's growled with embarassment and stood off of the bench; glaring down at the chordling Shikamaru.

"See?! I knew you'd laugh!"

-

The Outskirts of Konoha...

The journey to Mizu no Kuni was anticipated to be a rather long and quiet one, which is saying a lot seeing how Naruto was involved. The other members of Team 7 were left to themselves in peace without Naruto's ranting about how exciting or cool the mission was gonna be, and how absolutely psyched he was. That was questioning enough, but there was a simple answer behind such a strange phenomena...

Naruto DID have something to occupy himself with, afterall.

Throughout a vast chunk of the trip, NAruto had been positively itching to read the mysterious book that-umm... _graciously_ fell into his lap. At first, he wasn't really sure if it was a good idea, but later he figured it wouldn't do any harm. Its not like he had anything better to do. No longer debating the subject, the blonde Genin reached into his back-pack, pulled out the black book and flipped through the volumes upon volumes of literature that had him speechless.

_"Someone certainly has a lot of free-time... But still; I wonder where this book came from", _Naruto pondered before flipping the book back to the first page.

Focused, Naruto proceeded to read the opening summary to himself.

_'The wonderment that is Chaos is a vastly fasinating and grossly misunderstood entity that has both ransacked the world of its joyous glory, and enlightened those to new perspectives on human life and genuity. Despite its atrocious reputation as a sypher of pre and post-apocalyptic disasters, Chaos has more meaning and depth than one could possibly grasp with simple observations or meaningless perceptions; it is one of the very forces that have made up the fabric of existence itself. Without Chaos, and all of its under-appreciated glory, not only would life in the universe cease to be, but there would be no true order._

_As a personal message to those about to steep into the literary world of the Chaos Knight, I strongly implore any and all persons who have even a small connection between the events in your lives and the literature within these pages in any way, shape or form, to lock this book into a box, toss it into the ocean and walk way... now.'_

Okay... now he simply HAD to read it. He was a bit lost at how the name of the writer was torn out along with the peice of the page it was written on, but he wuickly got over. Naruto furrowed his brow out of excited curiousity and turned the page.

_'Chapter One: Beyond Our Sight..._

_The common perception of the word peace, is an illusion... To those who seek it, a message is always sent, yet ignored so easily; a message that brings forth enlightenment; enlightenment that real peace lies only within the fabric of Chaos. The illusion of peace is there to decieve those who are foolish enough to belive in it, thus preventing one from truly understanding the knowledge and wisdom that discord brings. Only through seeing beyond our sight can one truly understand without explaination._

_In the illusion of peace, one cannot see any threats and is blinded by the false serenity of blissful ignorance. And while blinded by such handicaps, one can be easily mis-lead; there are threats all around us. These threats come in all different shapes and sizes, and can be perfectly hidden bewteen the corners of both reality and the timelessness of our minds. In order to free ourselves from these meaningless illusions... we must learn that Chaos rules us all; we must learn to acknowledge it and to willingly accept it into our souls._

_Even the simplest entities can be decieving. The serene system of Nature itself can even blind one to the truth of it all; the animals, the plant-life, the germs that keep everything alive... How can one truly be sure that a trap has not been set in place? How can one see beyond nature and grasp the Chaos within the cooridor of deceptive peace?'_

Naruto gulped hard as he continued to read. He was getting excited over a damn book; that, in and of itself, was an enigma to be cautious of. But what really got him wired up was the fact that every word he read had a ring of truth to them. Was peace truly an illusion? Is everything around him really a trap? With those and several other questions now spiraling around his mind, Naruto stopped reading, closed the book and cautiously looked around the forested area that he and the others walked though.

Without freaking out at all, the blonde Genin watched and listened... to the peaceful workings of Nature. He squinted into it, trying to pry through the peaceful scene as best he could. To his discovery, he did find something that stood out a bit... a puddle in the middle of the road. Naruto stopped in front of the puddle and squinted at it while the others simply walked around it and went on ahead.

The only other person who stopped with him was Kakashi, who had his own reasons for studying the puddle. When he saw Naruto observing it as well, the silver haired Jonin looked at the boy curiously.

_"Hmm... Does Naruto see what I see?...", _he thought, _"How could he notice it before the others?"_

Once he was finished studying the strange puddle and Naruto, Kakashi signaled that it was time to move on.

"Lets go Naruto... We wouldn't want to get left behind", Kakashi nonchalantly suggested.

Without taking his eyes off of the puddle, Naruto absent-minedly nodded, and Kakashi walked around the puddle and proceeded onward. Naruto, on the other hand, was still squinting hard upon the puddle. He plowed his sight into it to the point where he began to sweat... but he saw nothing wrong with it... just an ordinary puddle.

"Huh... guess there's a big difference between seeing through illusions and being just plain paranoid", Naruto shrugged before jumping over the puddle.

BUT(!), just as he did that, he fell straight into an even bigger puddle, splashing water everywhere; his new book flipped within the air before it dropped to the ground on its spine. Naruto's head slowly emerged from the surface of the water with a comical squint on his face. He cursed beneath the water, making several bubbles rise and pop. Damn thing wasn't even there before.

Lifting his arm unto the ground to pull himself out, Naruto got to thinking that there was more to the little black book than met the eye. Unfotunately for him, getting out of that puddle wouldn't be a walk in the park.

"Hey! What the Hell?", Naruto grunted when he felt a strong tug at his leg.

He tried yanking his limb out, but it wouldn't budge. Upon his failed attempt, Naruto felt a strong and sharp jolt of pain strike at his leg.

"OUGH!! What in blue blazes is-... **WHOA**!!"

With that last shout, Naruto was completely yanked into the water. Sasuke jerked his head up at the noise and looked back. Thats when he noticed that they were short a person, as did the others.

"Wait... Where's Naruto?", she asked nervously.

_"And where did that other puddle come from?", _Kakashi inwardly questioned.

Suddenly, the said blonde burst high out of the water, screaming his head off. Not because he was startled, not because of the sudden emerge... but the fact that the lower half of his body was trapped within the jaws of a Great White Shark!

"AAAHAHAHOOW GOD-_**HELP**_ **_ME_**!!", Naruto screamed before he and the shark splashed back into the water.

Sakura shreiked in terror and Sasuke dashed toward the large puddle and dived into it. After a few moments of silence... the Shark emerged out of the water again with a half swallowed Naruto stabbing its nose with a kunai knife and Sasuke mounded upon it's fin slicing into it with his own kunai. It submerged into the puddle.

After another few seconds, the Shark emerged again with Sasuke using his arms and legs to pry it's massive jaws open before launching one of his arms down its thrown and pulling a meesy looking Naruto out by force. Throwing the blonde Genin back unto dry land, Sasuke was now contending with the shark before he, along with it, fell back into the water.

"Sasuke!", Naruto yelled before diving right back in.

The Shark burst out of the water AGAIN(!) with Naruto holding both of it's side-fins from behind as Sasuke proceeded to pound the living shit out of it's stomach. Naruto slammed down on the Shark's head with both of his fist before Sasuke shoved a paper into its mouth. They both gave the beasts head another good slam before scrambling out of the water.

Naruto gave it one last kick in the eye for good measure before they both dived forward and hit the dirt JUST as an explosion of wet shark-chunks erupted from the puddle. Once the rain of sushi ended, both exaugsted Genin flopped to their backs, breathing heavily.

"What... the Hell... is going on?!", Sasuke nearly yelled betwenn his heaving breaths.

"Don't you get it, man", Naruto questiones in mildly freaked out tone, "I-Its the Chaos... It all around us, bro!"

**_BHHHAAHA-HAH-HAH-HAH-HAHAAAA!! OMG!... ... That was fun... I await your feed back!_**

**_Peace!_**


End file.
